The consequences of past excursions
by phoenixgirl26
Summary: Harry Potter knows that going to the past could mean serious consequences, but he realises that he has to try to change what happened. Warning: slash, some strong language, some sexual references. Harry/Severus
1. Chapter 1

Chapter one

The first few weeks after the battle of Hogwarts people were starting to believe that Voldemort would not return, not like he did before, so people were going out more, starting to live their lives. All the Weasley's were trying to come to terms with the loss of one of their own, it was hard on all of them, but more on George than the others. Fred's funeral was hard again more on George than everyone else. All the Weasley's went with Harry to Remus and Tonks' funeral which was hard on Harry, losing the last person who had been close to the Potters. Hermione stayed close to Ron to help him through the loss of one of his brothers, she wanted to help Harry who seemed quiet and she thought maybe he was depressed and it got worse after Harry attending the funeral for Severus Snape, but that time he went alone, he had told everyone it was private so even without knowing why, they let Harry have that time alone. From the moment he arrived back at the Burrow he always said he wanted to be alone, which is what Harry did, spent time alone, especially down near the old pond.

Harry was leaning against the large tree as he stared around the apple orchard or over the water that rippled in the midday breeze. His thoughts kept going over everything, wondering if he could have changed something so Fred Weasley didn't die, so Remus and Tonks lupin didn't die, so Severus Snape didn't die. Every time Harry thought about what he had seen inside the shrieking shack, he felt like his very soul ached with sadness. No one knew the real Severus Snape, Harry did, no one even knew that Harry was more informed than anyone believed, his friends, Hermione and Ron who only knew part of everything, some about Severus Snape, some they didn't know. Apart from the ache he felt of who had died, Harry felt sick, that sickness went to his soul as well, the sickness caused by knowing he shared his soul with Voldemort. Hermione and Ron knew that, but Harry had asked them to keep that bit of information to themselves, which they promised to never repeat. Ron did say that he thought Harry should explain to his family so they would realise and understand how far Harry was willing to go to stop Voldemort and how far Voldemort was willing to go to live forever. Harry explained that for now he wanted it kept quiet, but he would think about explaining to the Weasley family, just not yet.

'Harry.'

Harry turned, 'Hi Ginny.'

'Can we talk?'

'Sure, I've been expecting to talk to you.'

Ginny sat down facing Harry, 'We both know why you broke up with me and I admit I was angry, then furious when you made us all believe you were dead. But I've been doing a lot of thinking and I know you have been as well.'

'Um, is this about us?'

'Sort of, I hope this doesn't hurt you Harry, but I realised my feelings for you weren't what I thought.'

'I'm not hurt Gin, but there is something I need to tell you about when we dated. To explain that though I will need to tell you some other stuff and I would like it kept private.'

'Okay, I promise, so you weren't expecting us to see each other again?'

'No, which I will explain, did you expect us to?'

'No, I was just surprised that's all.'

'Then we can talk about all this, but I want to make sure no one hears anything. Would it be alright if I cast some charms that I know, it will stop anyone hearing us or seeing us?'

'If you want, we should warn mum though, she might think we're up to something,' Ginny giggled.

'I do not want your mother thinking I'm shagging you Ginny.'

'Then let's go have lunch and tell me we're just going to be talking.'

'We might have to tell her that we're nothing more than friends.'

'She'd believe you if you said that, not me. You never lie to her, you might say outright that you can't tell her, but you never made up something that wasn't true and she knows that.'

'Alright, I'll tell her,' Harry stood, held his hand out to Ginny who took it and he pulled her to his feet, 'You're injures look better,' Harry looked at Ginny's hands and wrist, then her neck.

'They are, there just scars now, like all yours. Come on,' Ginny slipped her arm through Harry's and they walked into the house.

'You two friendly, are you back together?' Molly asked but Charlie, George and Percy looked up, Arthur glanced at his daughter than Harry.

'No, we didn't know you knew we dated.'

'Parents know things Ginny dear.'

'There's a few things I need to tell Ginny about when we dated. But no, neither of us want a relationship. So I wanted your permission to cast some charms down at the orchard, what I have to say is personal and private. I explained to Ron that maybe one day I can tell you some, which I will, but not yet. One thing I have to explain to Ginny I will tell you after we've talked.'

'Then you can cast your charms Harry, we trust you,' Arthur said.

'Dad, what if all this is a way to fool you so they can shag?' Charlie asked.

'I give my word that shagging Ginny is something that won't happen, not from me. We need to talk then I will explain which when I do you'll understand. I promise the only thing that Ginny and I will be doing is talking and maybe holding hands, like I do with Hermione, but I don't want to shag her.'

'You better not mate, Hermione's my girlfriend,' Ron said as he stepped into the kitchen with Hermione, 'So what's this about?'

'I need to talk to Ginny in private, but we both do not want to get back together. Now I want to use some of our charms so our conversation stays private.'

'Oh, okay then,' Ron sat down with Hermione.

'You trust Harry with Ginny?' Percy asked.

'Yeah, I do, but Harry will explain when he can.'

'Arthur has given permission, but after we eat, so sit down,' Molly said then placed food on the table.

'So is this about everything Harry?' Hermione asked.

'Yes, Ginny deserves to know as it does involve her. I just hope she doesn't hex me when she hears it.'

'Maybe I will, I won't know until I hear it.'

'If you do, I understand, but you can blame Dumbledore even though I went along with it.'

'No talking, eat,' Molly scolded, so that's what everyone did, even if they still talked, they did eat.

Harry and Ginny walked down towards the orchard, Harry cast his charms around Ginny then sat down against the tree, Ginny sat facing him.

'Did you ever get a sense about me, something that didn't feel right to you?'

'I'm not sure what you mean, when?'

'When we dated, when we snogged.'

'Oh, yes, I did, that's what had me thinking a lot when you were away. I used to watch others, like Bill and Fleur, I also remembered when I dated Dean. You never really put yourself into the kiss. Has that got to do with what you're going to tell me?'

'Yes, but first, can you explain why you don't want us to get back together?'

'Okay, being away, being in hiding, at Muriel's, there wasn't a lot we could do. I spent a lot of time alone, thinking. I realised that my feelings for you weren't real, I was more attracted to the boy who lived than you but it also gave me time to work something else out. But how I was attracted to you is when I worked everything out, does that make sense Harry?'

'Perfectly because Dumbledore told me the exact same thing and why I kissed you that night in the common room. But know this Ginny, I never wanted this, I told Dumbledore, he made sense though and it's because of someone's safety that I went along with it.'

'You were told to kiss me?'

'Basically, yeah, I like you Gin, a lot, you're a good friend and the last thing I wanted to do was hurt you and I definitely didn't want to use you. But as Dumbledore said many times, all of us were expandable if it meant the death of Voldemort. I never understood at the time, but I do now, more than ever before. Just know that I'm sorry you were pulled into this and I wish you weren't.'

Ginny could tell Harry was sorry, now she was about to hear exactly why he had become her boyfriend when it was obvious he never wanted to.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter two

'Okay, first thing and I hope this doesn't change our friendship in anyway.'

'It won't Harry, so just tell me.'

'I'm gay, figured it out when I was fourteen. I'll explain about that soon though. Anyway, when I was fifteen I realised I had developed feelings for someone, someone that shocked me actually. Dumbledore figured it out and decided to tell me the truth, or some of the truth, I still never knew it all until that night at Hogwarts.'

'That's what I sensed Harry, you were gay. Do you know why I thought that?'

'No, I'd never seen a gay man before, I thought at first something was wrong with me.'

'There around, one you know very well,' Ginny smiled, 'Charlie is gay.'

'Blimey, it was Charlie that made me realise I was gay, the first time I saw him. Hang on, your mum always said something about his girlfriends.'

'It was there little joke, mum and dad knew from the time Charlie was twelve, Bill figured it out when they were at Hogwarts. He said Charlie couldn't stop watching the boys when they went swimming. I overheard Charlie and Bill talking one night, it was late and I couldn't sleep. They were down in the living room having a drink, Charlie was telling Bill about the time he lost his virginity, he said it was painful, but he enjoyed it. He said that taking it up the arse is something you can never forget.'

'Ginny,' Harry's eyes widened as Ginny laughed, 'It's true though, bloody painful.'

'Oh, so you're not a virgin?'

Harry shook his head, 'No, I was sixteen which I know was too young, but we both realised we could die and I didn't want to die a virgin, I wanted to experience what it was like. That is the only reason he agreed, because both of us thought we would die.'

'So do I get to know who it was that shagged your arse?' Ginny laughed.

Harry chuckled, 'Soon, but you have a mouth on you Miss Weasley.'

'Being brought up with six older brothers tends to do that to a girl.'

'That's probably true. Okay, so you realised I was gay or you thought I was, so you knew nothing would happen with us?'

'That and the fact I happen to be gay as well, I like girls.'

Harry chuckled, 'I wonder if Dumbledore knew and that's why he picked you for me to date?'

'Dumbledore did seem to know things. But before you ask, no, I have not done anything more than snog her. So how about you tell me why this was necessary?'

'Okay, you heard about the prophecy, well what you don't know is that I heard the whole thing that night. So even though it got broken, Dumbledore was able to show me his memory of when the seer told him. I was the chosen one Gin. It was around that time Dumbledore filled me in on a lot of stuff that he realised keeping certain things to himself could get more killed like it got Sirius killed. He knew I blamed him as well and I was going to refuse to have anything to do with him, he knew I was serious. At the time he knew who I liked and because of what happened with Sirius he thought it was time to share a secret about a person who was helping but everyone thought he wasn't. He was a double spy, but all of you believed he was really a spy for Voldemort when he only pretended to be, he was really Dumbledore's spy. Anyway, once I knew and this person knew that I liked him, we talked a lot, in private, but never let anyone know, it was too dangerous. Dumbledore had explained his plan, to throw suspicion off the fact I was gay and who I liked. He said since I spent time here with your family or at Grimmauld place with your family, even at Hogwarts, and the fact that everyone knew you liked me, he thought you were the one that should be my girlfriend. Merlin did I yell at Dumbledore for that, I said I wasn't going to use Ginny, that she did like me and would end up hurt. I was worried you would have been hurt Gin, but like always, Dumbledore made sense. Friends can become more if they spend a lot of time together. So apart from feeling guilty about using you, I was also worried about him, if anyone found out he would have been killed, probably tortured first, to get information. Dumbledore talked me into dating Cho first as he overheard me say I thought she was pretty, she was, even for a gay bloke I can appreciate a pretty girl.'

'I think I know who you mean, but I'm not positive. Was it Malfoy?'

'No, but I could see you thinking it might be him, he's cute, but a real prat. Okay, Hermione and Ron know this and I only told them after the fighting. Ron was shocked so much that I thought he was going to hit me. Part of that was because of you and part was him. But Hermione being Hermione explained how they were, always fighting, arguing when they really liked each other and that's basically what we did, at the beginning. Once we stopped denying our feelings we were different in private, if anyone saw us they really thought we hated each other.'

'So Ron was okay with the gay part?'

'Not at first, but I explained what Dumbledore said to me, how it's not a choice and why would we chose to be in the minority, it makes life so hard, which is true because some people still can't accept gay relationships.'

'Yeah, I know, Luna and I spoke about that, how people might treat us when they knew.'

'It doesn't surprised me that Luna is gay, she's always been different.'

'That's what got me suspicious so we talked then snogged, a lot. Now why are you stalling, tell me who this bloke is?'

'I'm not really stalling Ginny, it's whenever I say his name it hurts, he died Gin.'

'Oh Harry, I'm sorry, was it in the fighting?'

'It happened that night,' Harry felt his eyes well up, 'See, thinking about him and I want to cry, again. I've done that so much over the last few weeks.'

'I'm so sorry,' Ginny squeezed Harry's hand, 'Tell me.'

Harry stared into Ginny's eyes and he could see she was genuinely sorry, 'Severus Snape, god I love him Gin and he loved me, but I couldn't save him. I was there, watching him die and I couldn't do anything. All the times he saved me, none of you knew how often he kept me alive, from the time I was little. The one time he was in danger and I couldn't do anything, it hurts so much.'

Ginny could tell Harry was going to lose it, so she wrapped her arms around him and let him cry into her shoulder, which he did. Harry's sobs made her choke up and she felt tears well up in her eyes. For a girl that normally doesn't cry, she wanted to cry for the pain her friend was going through.

After what felt like hours of crying from both Harry and Ginny, he removed the charms and they walked quietly back to the house. The moment they stepped inside, everyone could tell that Ginny and Harry had been crying. The Weasley's were all surprised by Ginny's red and swollen eyes as she wasn't the type of girl who cried, so whatever Harry told her was emotional, for both of them. Harry sat beside Hermione, Ginny stayed on the other side of Harry, both girls held his hands and both girls kissed his cheek, relaying they would always be there for him, even Ron who gave Harry a pat on the shoulder. Those three, Hermione, Ron and Ginny knew exactly how much Harry was hurting, they were the only ones that knew the truth. But they also know that the rest of the Weasley family were about to hear all about Harry Potter and Severus Snape's secret love affair.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter three

'Can you tell us what's going on Harry?' Arthur asked kindly.

'I figured out I was gay when I was fourteen, at fifteen I was I love with him,' Harry glanced at Ginny who nodded, 'Dumbledore filled me in on a lot of things, about him, his role in the war, he knew how I felt, I knew how he felt. So we talked a lot, working out plans to make sure no one picked up on the truth. I hated this part of the plan and if it wasn't vital I would have refused to have any part in it,' Harry sighed, 'Dumbledore told me to date girls, first was Cho, then he suggested Ginny since he knew she liked me and I spent time with all of you, either here, Grimmauld place or at Hogwarts. I refused, yelled, swore, I wasn't going to use Ginny like that, I didn't want her hurt. Dumbledore made sense, he had to keep the identity of this man true role secret, but some could have gotten suspicious, which meant he would have been killed but it also meant that Voldemort would have found out all our secrets, all our plans. Ginny doesn't hate me for it, I sometimes wish she did. But she understood just like all of us did, we all knew some things had to be kept secret, that sacrifices had to be made. He sacrificed his freedom, his life basically to keep me alive, to keep me safe, Dumbledore was willing to die to keep his secret, keep the secret of his role, I was willing to die to make sure Voldemort was gone from this world,' Harry gave Ginny a small smile, 'She one hell of a girl and a good friend.'

'Since I worked out or I thought I worked out Harry was gay it wasn't a shock, but I shocked Harry when I told him I was gay, that I have a girlfriend.'

'Blimey, I'm surrounded by bent people,' Ron smirked at Harry making him laugh.

'More than you know,' Ginny smirked but noticed Charlie was smiling as he shook his head.

'Okay, I'm gay, mum, dad and I like to make all of you believed I shag a lot of woman when I shag blokes.'

'I really am surrounded in them, is there anymore or is it just Charlie, Ginny and Harry?' Ron asked.

'Fred was gay,' George said sadly, 'He worked it out when he was thirteen, but he only told me.'

'I wish he told us,' Molly said sadly.

'So can you tell us who this boy was and why he's role was so vital?' Arthur asked.

Hermione, Ron and Ginny all nodded to Harry, 'Um, not a boy. First let me say this, yeah we were together, together in every way and I know it hasn't been that long since I turned seventeen, but we both realised we could die at any time, we wanted some happiness in case that happened. So from sixteen I talked him into a sexual relationship, took some doing, he was stubborn and only because of my age, and his age.'

'What do you mean not a boy and what do you mean you had sex at sixteen?' Molly asked.

'To make it legal, we bonded, that was the only way he would, Dumbledore performed the ceremony in his office,' Harry wiped tears from his cheek, 'He died, that night, my husband died,' Harry's face screwed up as he tried to fight the sob, but it was no good, 'I couldn't save him, I sat with him as he died, watched his face as his life left him.'

'Oh Harry,' Molly also wiped tears from her cheeks.

'Who was it?' Arthur asked.

'Severus Snape,' Harry heard gasps, but no one say anything, 'What you saw was an act, all of it was an act. Sev was kind, gentle, very loving, he was best friends with my mother, but he did have a thing for my father, that's why they hated each other. My father was straight and loved my mother, but he didn't want my mother's friend to be around, checking him out. We used to talk a lot about his time at Hogwarts, he wasn't sure if he felt real feelings for me or he was confusing me with my father. But he realised he wasn't when he stared into my eyes, the one part of me that isn't my father. We both denied it at first, but I couldn't stop watching him. Dumbledore worked it out and thought it was dangerous for Sev if anyone noticed the looks I gave him. So he filled me in on what Sev was doing, playing a double agent basically. He was a death eater when he was young, but changed sides when he found out the prophecy meant me. He went to Dumbledore who put more plans into action. During those occlumence lessons we'd spend time together, talking, getting to know each other, snogging,' Harry sighed, 'The prophecy was told to Dumbledore by the seer that made it, that night, after Sirius died Dumbledore showed me his memory, I was the Chosen one, the one meant to kill Voldemort or be killed by him.'

'You might have to explain the rest Harry or they won't understand,' Ron said cautiously.

Harry sighed but realised Ron was right, 'He couldn't die while I lived,' Harry lifted his hair off his scar, 'This was not because of the killing curse even though he used that curse on me, he was also doing something else,' Harry opened his shirt to show his other scar, 'He used the killing curse again but again it's not the reason behind these scars,' Harry did his shirt back up, 'The night he tried to kill me he was performing dark magic, dark magic that would make sure he couldn't die. He had already done this piece of dark magic five times, he wanted seven. So that night as he said the killing curse he was going to make another dark object, but because of my mother's sacrifice he disappeared and I became the dark object. The other scar is from when he destroyed the dark object. This is one of the secrets we had to make sure Voldemort never figured out. The dark object inside me was part of his soul, those pieces of soul is what kept him alive, to make sure he would never die. If he figured out I was one he wouldn't have killed me, but kept me, prisoner, forever, as long as I survived he would live. So when,' Harry's face screwed up again as more tears fell from his eyes.

'We saw Voldemort tell Nagini to kill Snape, when he left we went in, Harry kept pressure on Snape's neck. He told Harry to take them, to see me,' Hermione said sadly, 'He was giving Harry his memories, right after that he died.'

'God,' Harry's released a sob he tried to hold in, 'He stared at me with so much love in his eyes, yet I couldn't save him, then nothing, no life.'

'In the memory, Snape was telling Harry about the piece of soul inside him, Dumbledore said Voldemort had to kill Harry or he would never die, so Harry surrendered to him.'

'I wanted to go to Sev, so I stood there, let him kill me, but I woke up. The soul was destroyed, the snake was the last, then him.'

'Did he suspect Severus Harry, is that why he killed him?' Arthur asked.

'No, that's something else, but he didn't care about life, just his own. He needed to kill the person that killed Dumbledore, he just didn't know all the facts. Sev didn't have to die, it made no difference to what Voldemort wanted, he just thought it did,' Harry put his hand inside his shirt and pulled out a chain, undid it, then slipped a ring onto his finger, but kept the other ring on the chain, 'Sev bought these,' Harry stared down at the ring on his left finger, 'Oh Sev,' tears flowed freely down Harry's face, but he wasn't the only one that cried, Hermione, Ginny and Molly were all crying, the men around the table just sat and watched Harry, they could see how much he was hurting, his heart we broken and they weren't sure if there was anything they could do or say to help.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter four

Over the next week everyone at the Burrow was still feeling the pain of their loss, but now they were trying to help Harry deal with his. He lost Sirius, then he lost Albus, now he lost the one he loved most, Severus. All of them were worried, Harry spent so much time alone and once he finished explaining he hardly spoke after that but would stare at the ring on his finger all the time.

Molly walked up the stairs ready to gather washing when she heard Ginny shouting at Charlie.

'What is going on?'

'Charlie thinks that if he could get Harry to date him it might help.'

'That is the last thing Harry needs right now, his grieving, he does not want to think about seeing someone else.'

'I just thought it might help.'

'You just want to shag him, that's the truth of it Charlie,' Ginny said.

'I admit his cute, but no, I just want to cheer him up.'

'Then cheer him up without asking him to go out, as a friend, yes, as a man, no. Now do you have any washing while I'm here?'

'I took it down mum, I'm not a kid anymore you know.'

'Sometimes you act like one Charlie,' Molly shook her head then left the room with Ginny who helped gather any washing from all the rooms.

Arthur stepped into his shed and saw Harry sitting at one of the benches, 'Harry.'

'Hey Mr. Weasley.'

'What are you doing hiding down here?'

'I can't take the looks anymore, Mrs. Weasley looks like she's going to cry every time she sees me, Ginny is almost as bad.'

'They just know how you're feeling,' Arthur sat down, 'They want to help, they just don't know how.'

'Nothing will help, maybe time,' Harry shook his head.

'Yes, maybe time is what you need, but staying isolated here at the Burrow isn't the best thing right now, you haven't left once.'

'I'm not ready to face everyone.'

'Sorry to tell you but you have no choice,' Arthur held up an opened letter and an unopened letter, 'Kingsley, he wants you, Ron and Hermione to go into his office, they need official statements about what you three were doing before you arrived at Hogwarts, during the fighting and right after.'

Harry sighed as he took the note from Mr. Weasley, 'Tomorrow.'

'Yes, he's going to have a couple of hit wizards escort you three to his office where the head auror will be taking your statements. I don't know what the other note has to say.'

Harry unsealed the second note, 'The Unspeakables want to talk to me about Voldemort.'

'You're the only person alive that knows the answers they would need.'

'I know, their trustworthy, aren't they Mr. Weasley?'

'Yes, very, that is the one department we never had to worry about. The Unspeakables go through years of tests, questioning, and interrogations before they are allowed into certain areas of the department of mysteries. They take an unbreakable vow once they pass all those tests, they literally can't speak about what they do or they die. Naturally they speak to the minister about what they want to do, once they have permission then it never gets discussed. If they have asked you to speak with them, then they must have worked on an old charm that would allow them to speak with someone outside the department, but that charm needs to be done by every unspeakable working there.'

'Sounds like their okay then.'

'I'm sure it's all fine, they just need answers. But you can't stay down here alone Harry, it's not good for you.'

'I can't, not yet, I miss him so much. We talked about having a family if we survived and if it was ever over. Neither of us wanted to bring kids into the world that he might end up running. I felt it, right to my soul that he was my soul mate, now he's gone. I just don't know how to go on without him. He's been there my whole life, now he's not.'

'You need time, a lot of time, but your heart will heal. You won't believe it now, but it will. I'm not talking about seeing anyone else, only you will know when that might happen. I think the best thing right now is see your friends, go meet your godson, start living Harry. Would Severus want you to be sitting down in a dark shed, alone, wasting your life?'

'No, but I just can't think of anything but him. I'm okay Mr. Weasley, I just need some more time.'

'Alright, but it's time for dinner, why don't you clean up?'

Harry sighed then followed Arthur Weasley back to the house and straight upstairs to clean up. Harry never went downstairs but took out his small picture of him and Severus, he sat on the bed staring at it, remembering the day Dumbledore took it, the day Harry and Severus got married.

'Harry,' Hermione said quietly, 'dinner's ready.'

'Look,' Harry held out the picture, 'Dumbledore took that, he borrowed Colin's camera. Colin was so excited when I said that professor Dumbledore wanted to borrow his camera.'

Hermione stared at Harry and Severus, they were looking at each other and she could see just by this small picture that Harry and Severus loved each other very much, it was written all over their faces.

'You look so happy.'

'We were, then went down to his rooms and shagged until I couldn't walk,' Harry took the picture back, 'I remember when he first took his robes off, oh he was beautiful, all muscles. He picked me up like I weighed nothing and threw me on the bed, then kissed me until I didn't know what my name was, I didn't know anything except what he made me feel. I miss him Hermione.'

'I know you do Harry,' Hermione sat beside Harry, put her arm around him, 'I know you do. Was he a good kisser?'

Harry smiled, 'So good, his tongue was sinful. He used to make me feel so alive, like I had never lived before. I don't know if I can on without him, it hurts so much, hurts to breathe.'

'You can, but you have to let us help you.'

'It was hard enough after Sirius died, but Sev, my heart doesn't want to beat anymore, the pain is excruciating, in here,' Harry hit his chest then wiped the tears away before he turned and buried his head in Hermione's shoulder and cried.

Ginny and Ron were standing at the door listening, Ginny had tears falling down her face, Ron looked shocked, but he took his sister's hand and pulled her away, down the stairs to the kitchen.

'Ginny, what's wrong?'

'We overheard Harry talking to Hermione, he's saying he doesn't think he can go on without him. He's in so much pain right now.'

'I'm worried about him dad, you saw the way he was after Sirius died, this is worse.' Ron sighed.

'I'm worried as well Ron, really worried. Maybe it's time to take matters into our hands.'

'What do you mean dad?' Ginny asked.

'Get some of your friends here, try and get Harry to see that life is worth living, that Severus wouldn't want him to give up. While their gone tomorrow Ginny, can contact them, see if they can come here for dinner?'

'It might help dad, Ginny knows which ones to invite, maybe Andromeda Tonks as well, with Teddy. He used to say that he wished he had Sirius with him when he was little. If we can make Harry see how much Teddy could use his godfather as he grows, it might be enough to give Harry something to hang onto.'

'Yes, that is a very good idea, I'll contact her tomorrow.'

'There coming,' Ginny whispered then quickly cleaned her face, sat next to Charlie and made it looked like they had been talking. Ron did the same with his father, kept talking like nothing was going on, but all of them saw Harry's red and swollen eyes, they seem to be part of him now.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter five

Harry, Hermione and Ron walked between four hit wizards through the atrium which fell silent the moment the golden trio was spotted. No one spoke, they just watched the three friends head towards the lifts.

'That's spooky,' Ron whispered.

'What is?' Hermione asked.

'The way everyone stared, but it was so quiet, I couldn't hear anything.'

'It's the first time anyone has seen the golden trio since that night, it's the first time anyone saw the saviour.' one of the hit wizards said.

'I'm no saviour, the ones that died are,' Harry's bottom lip trembled again, 'Damn,' Harry slammed his fists against the wall.

'It's okay Harry, please, you'll make me cry,' Hermione took Harry's hands then wiped the tear from Harry's face, 'Please don't, I can't take it anymore.'

'How do you think I feel Hermione, god I can't do this, he's gone and I'll never see him again, ever. How do I do this, go on without him, he was my life, my whole life.'

'We'll help you Harry, please, just give us time.'

The lifts arrived, Ron pulled Harry inside, 'Don't give up on us, not now, he wouldn't want you to.'

Harry wiped his face, 'I know he wouldn't,' Harry took a couple of deep breaths, 'Let's just get this done then I might get drunk.'

'I'll join you,' Ron said but saw Hermione scowl, 'Let's all get drunk, I'm sure Charlie will.'

'I might have a small drink but I won't get drunk.'

Harry smiled at Hermione, 'You'd have a drink with me.'

'Yes, I would, but do not talk me into more Harry Potter.'

Harry hugged his friend, 'Thanks Hermione, you're a good friend.'

'I'll always be your friend, now clean your face, it looks terrible.'

'You do it, you always have, why change now,' Harry turned completely until he was facing Hermione who smiled and pointed her wand at Harry's face casting her charm until his eyes were no longer swollen or red.

'That's better. At least doing this now is easier without your glasses, but doesn't your contacts go all blurry?'

'Sometimes, it's fine,' Harry turned back when the lifts open, the hit wizards all looked around nervously until they stepped out and escorted Harry, Hermione and Ron to the minister's office.

'Hey you three.'

'Hey Kingsley, those robes suit you,' Harry said giving a small smile.

'I like to think they do, let's get this done,' Kingsley turned to the hit wizards, 'You can go now, I'll let you know when their ready to leave.'

'Sir,' the hit wizards glanced at Harry before leaving.

'What was that look for?'

'Harry kind of lost it before, hit the wall,' Ron shrugged.

'I think I broke my knuckle.'

'I can get someone to look at that while we talk,' Kingsley opened the door to his office, 'This is Gawain Robards, he is now the head auror, Gawain, Harry Potter, Hermione Granger and Ron Weasley, or as they are known, the golden trio.'

'Such a lame name,' Ron said but shook the head aurors hand, then Hermione and Harry did.

Kingsley sent a memo off then the group sat down then started to tell their story, Kingsley and Gawain could tell something was being left out, but they didn't say anything. One thing they noticed was Hermione and Ron did all the talking, Harry seemed to stare off into space a lot, then stare down at his left hand. They stopped talking for a few minutes when the ministry's healer turning up and healed Harry's broken hand. When he was finished the group continued their conversation.

'Okay, as aurors we are trained to know when we're not being told everything. But before we get to that, Harry, what's up, you seemed kind of down?'

Harry sighed, then took some parchment and a picture out of his wallet and handed it to Kingsley, then started to play with his wedding ring.

'Oh merlin, why didn't any of us know?'

'It was too dangerous for Sev, we had to keep it quiet.'

'We saw him die Kingsley, it's been hard on Harry,' Hermione said softly.

'So you got married when you were sixteen.'

'Yeah, it was the only way he'd make love to me, he refused because of my age, then said we had to be married, not that I minded, I wanted to marry him,' Harry took his certificate back, folded it and stuck it back in his wallet, but stared at the picture of his wedding day.

'Okay, I'm sorry you're going through a hard time right now, but we need to get this done. Now what are you three leaving out?'

Hermione and Ron glanced at Harry, 'We can explain Kingsley, but there is one bit that I can't talk about.'

'It's over Harry so why?'

'I don't want anyone to know.'

'Is this about the horcruxes because that was going to be my next question?'

'Yes.'

'The Unspeakables know he made seven.'

'So that's what they want to speak with me about?'

'They do, that's news to me.'

'Yeah, got a note asking if I would drop in and fill them in on Voldemort.'

'You'll be the first person that isn't an Unspeakable allowed in there since that department was started, they must think it's important. Okay, as aurors we know what horcruxes are, we know how to destroy them, we don't know how to make them which I'm pleased about and really, we don't need to know.'

'I know how, but that stays private.'

'Can you explain how you know?'

'Dumbledore,' Harry shrugged.

'Do you two know?' Kingsley asked, Hermione and Ron shaking their heads, 'Dumbledore and his secrets, but this time I do understand. So can you tell us what seven items they were, apart from the snake, I figured that one out myself when Neville killed it.'

'I can tell you about six, not seven. Yeah, Nagini was one, made after his return a few years ago. A cup that belonged to Helga Hufflepuff, the diadem of Rowena Ravenclaw, a locket that belonged to Salazar Slytherin, a ring that belonged to his wizard grandfather and his diary that opened the chamber of secrets.'

'So three items that belonged to the founders. Do you know if he wanted an item of Godric Gryffindor?'

'Yeah, but he couldn't find anything.'

'Do you know why he wanted items that belonged to the founders of Hogwarts?' Gawain asked.

'Hogwarts meant a lot to him, it made him special, over the muggles, but it also taught him how to use his magic. But it's a lot like me in a way, Hogwarts was his home, he was raised in an orphanage alongside muggles. I always thought of Hogwarts as my home, from the moment I stepped in there, he felt the same.'

'Yes, I suppose that makes sense. Do you know why he made the snake one as it's not advised to make one out of a living thing?' Kingsley asked.

'Dumbledore thinks it was because he couldn't find anything of Gryffindor's. You see, every item meant something to him, they were personal to him, Nagini was the closest thing to him. For someone that couldn't love, he did care about the snake. I used to feel that when he possessed her, he was protective of her.'

'I know you three are close and I worked out that Dumbledore only told you three about the horcruxes, did he involve Neville in those discussions?'

'Ron and I weren't there during those talks, Harry would pass on the information to us, but only information Dumbledore wanted us to know. Neville didn't know anything.'

'Then why did he kill the snake?'

'I asked him to,' Harry sighed, 'You'll probably work it out, if you do I don't want it in some release,' Harry sighed again, 'Sev gave me some information, the most important information there was, this was just before he told me to surrender to him, that I was letting my friends die.'

'Minerva showed me the memory Harry, is that what you didn't want anyone to know?'

Harry nodded, 'Makes me sick thinking about it. Anyway, I was going to die, I thought about Hermione and Ron and if they died. I had to think sensibly, seriously consider the fact that Ron and Hermione might not get a chance to kill the snake. So as I was walking back down through the castle that kept coming into my mind, then I saw Neville carrying in dead people. I know I could have told you or McGonagall, but you would have asked why and I couldn't explained, not then, there wasn't time, people were dying and once I was dead and the snake gone, maybe the deaths would end. Neville never asked me why, just said he was going to keep fighting,' Harry sighed again then looked back down at his picture which was still in his hand.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter six

Hermione and Ron headed home while Harry was escorted to the department of mysteries. He never took a lot of notice as he walked through one door after another until he came to a very large and sterile looking room where men and woman of all ages were working.

'Mr. Potter, thank you for coming,' a man held his hand out, 'I'm Carkin Malloy.'

'It's nice to meet you Mr. Malloy.'

'I'm sure you're wondering why we asked you here when nobody is ever invited into this department.'

'I figured you wanted information on Voldemort that only I could give you.'

'Yes, as much as you could if you wouldn't mind.'

'Can you explain why you want to know all this?'

'To stop this happening again, that's our hope.'

'Well, then I'll tell you what I know because I never want to face someone like him again.'

'Then let's sit and talk,' Carkin gestured to a set of comfortable looking sofa's, 'I assume, correct me if I'm wrong, you got the information from Albus Dumbledore?'

'Yeah, he filled me in on everything, showed me memories of anyone that would give them up, even his own memories of his times with Voldemort.'

'Memories, do you still have those memories?'

'There still in his old office at Hogwarts, I could write to professor McGonagall, ask if she can send them to you.'

'That would be most helpful. After studying his body, we realised he split his soul seven times. But the first thing I would like to know is about his youth, his parents, do you know anything about them?'

'Yes, his mother was a witch, Merepe Gaunt, her father and uncle thought she was a squib, they put her down all the time, so she was sort of suppressed. When her father and her uncle was sent to Azkaban that's when she found herself, found her magic. I will say this, she wasn't a bad person, nice, abused by her family, sorry to say this but she was ugly, but sad in a way. His father was a muggle, Tom Riddle sr. The mother used a love potion on him, she was besotted by him. He was a very good looking man, popular, rich, a little arrogant but even for a muggle, he wasn't bad. She was so in love with him that after a while she felt terrible using a potion so she stopped. He left her alone and pregnant, she gave birth to that in the orphanage he was raised in, died right after telling them what his name would be, Tom Marvolo Riddle, Marvolo was her father's name.'

'That was one of our questions, was his parents into dark magic, evil in any way. By the sound of it they weren't.'

'The grandfather and uncle believed they were better than everyone else because they were purebloods, they could speak parseltongue, the uncle, Morphan Gaunt, he would use his magic on muggle, give them things like hives, had a dead snake nailed to the door. They weren't nice men in anyway, but I can't say if they used dark magic or not. One of the memories was a ministry official that had to see Morphan about his attack on Tom Riddle. I don't remember the name though.'

'That's quite alright, I'm sure I will be able to find that information. So he was a halfblood which is what we suspected and he was raised with muggles. When did he find out about his magical heritage?'

'He used magic to frighten the other kids, but it was Dumbledore that told him he was a wizard, that was around his eleventh birthday. Dumbledore said to me then that he would be keeping an eye on him, there was something about him, even then. I saw it, in the memory, you could just tell there was something about him even as a kid.'

'We know he had to murder to make his horcruxes, do you know who he murdered?'

'He murdered his uncle when he was sixteen, Dumbledore believed that is when he turned the Gaunt ring into a horcrux, using something that belonged to his family that to him were beneath him. We also know that he made the diadem right after he left Hogwarts as a student, he found it in Albania, killed some poor peasant to turn it into a horcrux, I don't know his name, Dumbledore never told me that. The locket of Slytherin and the cup of Hufflepuff he made at or around the same time. He killed this woman who owned them, modified her house elf's memory to make it seem like Hokey poisoned her mistress. The diary was made while he was a student, but we don't know when or who he killed. The diary was given to a death eater to slip to a student so that student would become possessed by it and open the chamber of secrets to release the basilisk. Ginny Weasley was that student, I saved her when I was twelve, I stabbed the diary with a basilisk fang.'

'A very brave thing to do for a twelve year old. Can you tell me how you got hold of a basilisk fang?'

'I shoved the sword of Gryffindor up through its head, a fang pierced my arm. I pulled the sword out and the fang was still in my arm, so I pulled it out then went back to Ginny who was dying. She woke up when I stabbed the diary.'

'Did you know stabbing the diary with a basilisk fang would destroy the horcrux?'

'I didn't know it was a horcrux, not until four years later. But I stabbed it in the hope to destroy the link between the memory of Voldemort as a boy to Ginny. That was also part of the diary, it linked him as a student to whoever it possessed. He was becoming more real, more alive while he drained the life out of Ginny.'

'So without even realising it, you destroyed a horcrux. We all heard the stories about a secret chamber at Hogwarts, how did you find it when wizards such as Albus Dumbledore never did?'

'A few things we worked out, Hermione worked out a lot for us. She said it was using the pipes to get around without anyone seeing it, she worked out the monster was a basilisk because the roosters were being killed and spiders were always seen. The thing is, no one could hear it, but I could, I am a parselmouth. Hermione had been petrified, Ron and I found a piece of paper in her hand explaining those things I just mentioned. We sat talking about what we knew and one thing we worked out was a girl had died the last time it had been released, that girl was Moaning Myrtle, the ghost. See, Hermione brewed polyjuice potion for us that year, we used Moaning Myrtle's bathroom, she ended up having a thing for me. So we spoke to her about how she died, all she remembered was seeing a big set of yellow eyes before she died. Oh she did says she was in one of the cubicles crying, some kid had been picking on her, she said someone came in and could hear something, like a made up language and it sounded like a boy. So Ron and I went back to the bathroom and Myrtle pointed to the spot where she saw the basilisk as she died, near the sinks. We studied them, on the side was a serpent, Ron suggested that I speak parseltongue, I did, it opened. We only went down there because Ginny had been taken, Ron's little sister and Lockhart was running away, we had him with our wands on him, made him go down first. But he pretended to faint, took Ron's wand and tried to remove our memories, Ron's wand was broken, the roof collapsed, Ron and Lockhart was on one side, I was on the other, the side that lead further down. Ron decided to try and move the rocks while I went to find Ginny.'

'An amazing story Mr. Potter and for a twelve year old. As you know, you do get written about, but we do know that not all those stories about you are true. So to hear one story from you is truly amazing. Now I noticed you only mentioned six horcruxes, do you know what the seventh is?'

'Yeah I know, it was me,' Harry lifted his hair to show his scar. He could tell straight away that Carkin had worked it out, the scar was not from the killing curse but by a piece of Voldemort's soul entering his body, so Harry showed him the other scar and again Carkin knew what had happened, he knew the truth. But Harry could tell that this man would keep that piece of information just between his colleagues in the department of mysteries.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter seven

After Harry finished answering Carkin's questions, he allowed the man to do a few tests on him, one was to check to make sure that becoming a horcrux didn't cause Harry any problems even though it was now destroyed. Carkin also took some of Harry's blood to do some other tests. Then he wanted to test Harry's magic now the soul of Voldemort was destroyed. Harry had been surprised by some of the magic he could now do, things he had trouble with before, but one that shocked him was using wandless magic. Harry thought that might come in handy so he would keep that quiet, even from his friends. When Harry left, this time not being escorted, he passed through room after room until he came to one room that was familiar, a room that had been partially destroyed the night Sirius died, the room that held time turners. Harry stared around at all the different types of time turners and before he could really think about what he was doing, Harry grabbed one of each, shoved them in his pocket then left and hoped no one found out he had stolen time turners. He had no idea why he stole them because he'd never stolen anything before in his life and time turners could be dangerous if used the wrong way.

'So how was it?' Ron asked the moment Harry stepped into the kitchen.

'Not bad, I even let Carkin, that's the bloke I spoke to, I let him do a few tests on me and for him to take my blood,' Harry sat down and Mrs. Weasley put a cup of tea in front of him, 'Thanks, I'm not used to talking that much, my throats a bit sore,' Harry took a welcome sip of his tea, 'Where's Hermione?'

'She's organising everything for our trip to Australia. After we left you we organised an international port key, she wants to leave the day after tomorrow.'

'She's anxious to see her parents, I get that, plus she probably wants Crookshanks back.'

'Blimey, I forgot about that blasted cat. Anyway, are you sure you don't want to come with us? Maybe getting away will be a good thing.'

'No, you two deserve some time alone and I'm just not in the mood to go anywhere. I might look for my own place while you're gone.'

'You know there's no hurry about that Harry.'

'I know Mrs. Weasley, but I have to get on with my life, somehow, maybe getting my own place will be the start of that.'

'If you want dear, but we're happy for you to stay.'

'I know and I love staying here, but all kids leave home eventually,' Harry smiled at Mrs. Weasley.

'He's right, we all do mum. So by the time we get back you might not be living here.'

'Maybe, depends on how long it takes me to find the right place. I know I don't want something small, I'm used to having space around me now. Hogwarts, here, even Grimmauld place was big. So I'll probably buy a house, something that might have a bit of land around it, something big enough to have a fly occasionally.'

'You can afford it, so you might as well.'

'Harry,' Hermione smiled as she walked down the stairs with Ginny.

'Hey, Ron said your organising everything for your trip.'

'Yes, mainly gathering all the information about how to get to the Australian ministry of magic and the muggle immigration. So how did your talk go with the Unspeakables?'

'Good, Carkin Malloy asked me a lot of questions about him, his childhood, his family. Oh I have to send McGonagall a letter. I told Carkin about the memories Dumbledore collected, he wants to see them. I might do that now before I forget,' Harry summoned a quill, parchment and ink and quickly wrote a note to McGonagall, 'Can I use pig Ron?'

'Yep, he's in my room, or was the last time I saw him.'

'I'll be right back,' Harry ran up the stairs and was surprised when Pig flew straight down to him, 'Take that to McGonagall at Hogwarts,' Harry watched the small owl fly off then went into the room he used, the twins old room where he shoved all the time turners into his old rucksack with his thoughts on why he took them and would anyone find out. Harry sat on the bed and took his picture back out again, staring at Severus, 'Is it because of you babe, did I do this to change what happened, could I risk it?' Harry wasn't sure what to do, all he could think about was how much he missed Sev.

Harry was sitting outside staring down at the orchard, 'Sitting alone again Harry.'

Harry looked up at Arthur Weasley, 'Just thinking. Can I ask you something Mr. Weasley?'

'Anything,' Arthur pulled a chair close to Harry and sat.

'If you could go back and change things so Fred lived, would you do it?'

'That is a question we have all asked ourselves. I think it's a natural thing to think about. The trouble with doing it could mean we might lose others. Not long after it happened, I did think about it. I'd see George, he looked so lost without Fred, then I'd see Molly who would stare at George all the time, we all saw her doing it and we all know who she was thinking about.'

'Yeah, Fred.'

'If I could change it so Fred lived but the rest of my family did as well, that includes you Harry, it could mean Voldemort was still here. I don't think that's a risk I would like to take, would you?'

Harry stared back down at the orchard, 'I lost my parents, Sirius and Sev, sometimes I think to have them back I would put up with Voldemort being here, but if he was here they could still die, we all could. I don't know, I just miss him, miss all of them. It's like a hole inside me, there's something missing that only Sev being here could fill, make it better. It's been two months and the pain is just as strong now as it was that night.'

'That won't ease for a long time, it doesn't mean you'll miss him any less, you just learn to live with the loss. You've done it before, after Sirius died, you can do it again.'

'If it wasn't for Sev I wouldn't have survived,' Harry stared down at his ring, 'Sev found me with a knife, he knew what I was going to do.'

'Then I'm glad he found you. But why a knife and not the curse? It's painless and quick.'

'I survived as a kid, I wasn't sure if I would again. I know why now but then I didn't know everything. I sometimes think staying here isn't worth it for me. I've never had a good life Mr. Weasley, I forced myself to have fun with my friends when I never felt like doing anything. I sometimes think I was born just to fulfil that prophecy.'

'I'm sure that would make sense to you. But you have a lot of love that you shared with Severus, surely that was worth it.'

'All the time we were together, we never actually had a lot of private time. An hour here, the odd night, there was never enough time, there was something always going on.'

'But those times would be precious to you, memories that will always be with you. I know I wouldn't trade one memory of Fred, not for anything.'

'I do cherish all my memories of Sev, that's why I want to get a pensieve, see them more clearly. But I'm sorry about bringing this up, must have been hard on you thinking about Fred.'

'I never stop thinking about him Harry, just like you never stop thinking about Severus, Sirius and your parents. But the ones we lost are never truly gone, not when we remember them,' Arthur patted Harry on the shoulder before heading inside.

Harry stared at a gnome that was sneaking towards the house, but his thoughts were on those time turners. Was it worth it to have a life with his family when it could mean Voldemort was still here. Harry had no idea what to do he just knew he wanted the pain to stop.


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter eight

After Hermione and Ron left for Australia Harry's thoughts never left the time turners. He kept thinking that if he did this, went back in time, now would be the perfect time to do it, Hermione wasn't here who might work out what he was doing. Ginny and Charlie kept trying to get Harry to go out, to have a fly, even just to get Harry to play chess or exploding snap, Harry just couldn't find the energy to do anything. Arthur even asked Harry if he wanted help looking for a home, Harry knew why he asked, to try and get Harry out, even if it was just looking for a place to live. But again Harry thought of Sev, that he wouldn't be living with the man he loved so that brought a whole new wave of pain.

Harry walked down the stairs, 'I'm heading out for a while, not sure how long I'll be.'

'Are you going to look for a house because I could come with you?' Ginny asked.

'No, I'm going to the cemetery,' Harry saw understanding and that even made him choke up, so he quickly left the house, apparating straight to Godric's Hollow.

Harry sat at Severus' grave, 'I don't know if I can keep going Sev, the pain is just so strong. If you're watching then you know what I did, I'm not sure if I should use them or not. I know if I go back in time I only have to stop that attack somehow, make you stay away from the shrieking shack, but if I'm going to risk everything to make sure you live why can't I have the rest of my family. A few changes and my parents live which would mean Sirius lives as well. I don't know what to do, I just know I can't go on without you,' Harry ran his finger over Severus' name but his thoughts were on Severus' fingers running over his body, how just the tip of Severus' finger could make Harry's body come alive, now he felt nothing. He kissed Severus' name then hurried from the cemetery, went around the back of his parent's house then pulled the time turning out, a year one, a month one and a day one, with the one to reverse it if he needed. Harry had been lucky, he found the information on time turners in one of Hermione's books otherwise Harry knew he wouldn't have worked out which time turner was which. Harry hung the four time turners around his neck then spun the first one, when he stopped spinning he turned to second, then the third. He quickly pulled his invisibility cloak out of his jacket, threw it over himself and moved to the large glass doors at the back of the now lit and undamaged house, 'My parents,' Harry whispered as he watched his mother and father at the table with a dark haired baby boy, 'My hair was always messy, even back then.'

Harry realised he could come back and see his parents later, he needed to change a few things, first he needed to head to the Hogshead. After quietly moving back around the house to the front, he headed down the road, stepped into the cemetery and went down behind a large tombstone before taking the cloak off and apparating away.

Harry knew what was going to happen, he just didn't know when. He stepped into the pub and over to the counter where a younger Aberforth Dumbledore was standing.

'Firewhiskey,' Harry said keeping his face lowered. When the old man put a glass on the bar, Harry handed him some money then went to sit down in the back where the dark would keep him partially concealed.

Harry sipped his drink but his eyes remained on the door. It was only twenty minutes later that Harry's heart hammered in his chest, Albus Dumbledore stepped into the pub, he spoke with his brother before heading upstairs. Harry got up and headed for the bar and Aberforth.

'Bathroom.'

'Upstairs on the left.'

Harry nodded then made sure he didn't hurry just walked normally up the stairs. He heard Dumbledore and Trelawney's voice and knew he had the right day. He saw the bathroom so he stepped in but kept the door slightly ajar. A few minutes later a younger Severus Snape stopped, glanced around then put his ear to the door.

'Sorry Sev,' Harry whispered the pointed the elder wand at him and cast the imperius curse, making Severus forget what he was doing and to leave. Once he was gone Harry pulled the cloak over himself and went back to the door to listen and within second he heard Trelawney speaking the prophecy, but this time Severus never heard it to relay it to Voldemort. 'One down,' Harry smiled, pulled the cloak off then left the pub. He moved down behind his parent's home again and thought while he had time he would watch his parents interact with him as a baby, 'They look happy, hopefully now we all can be,' Harry sighed then decided to check to see if his parents were still alive when he was two, so again Harry took the time turners out, spun the year one only. Once he stopped spinning he was staring at himself walking around the house, his father, Sirius and Remus were sitting together. Harry didn't know much about kids this young but he figured he went to the right time, so he must be two, after his parents had died and after he had been left with the Dursley's. Now he had to check on some other things to see if they were the same or if he changed something he shouldn't have. He went to move when he heard his mother's voice.

'Oh James, we have to go see them, let them know we'll do anything.'

'What can we do Lil, their son was killed. I don't know how Alice and Frank are going to get through this. If I lost Harry I don't know what I would do,' James stared at his son who was chasing the cat.

Harry stumbled back away from the house, 'Neville, no, he wasn't supposed to die. I can't let that happen. But I need to see Sev before I reverse this,' Harry moved away from the house then apparated to Spinners End. He went to the front but couldn't see inside, so Harry quickly knocked then moved back out of the way. Harry's heart ached when he saw Sev opened the door and peer out, 'Oh Sev, I won't let you die,' he whispered then quietly moved away then found a deserted dark alleyway where he spun the one time turner he had hoped not to use. When he finished spinning he apparated away, arriving at the Burrow a few seconds later.

'You've been gone for hours Harry, are you okay?' Ginny asked.

'Yeah, I just sat talking to him, then to my parents, I'll be right back down,' Harry hurried up the stairs where he put the time turners back in his rucksack, then went to clean up, 'Okay, so that didn't work, he must have found out that Neville's parents were working for the order of the phoenix or he found out about the prophecy some other way but thought it meant Neville, not me,' Harry sighed, 'What can I do to make sure Neville didn't die but his parents and Sirius live as well.' Harry knew he was risking a lot so making sure Sev lived he wanted to make sure his parents and Sirius did as well. He would think about it tonight then try again tomorrow. So Harry headed downstairs, sat next to Ginny just as Mrs. Weasley dished up dinner.


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter nine

Harry went back in time the next day, this time he decided to let Severus hear the prophecy, but did something he never thought he'd do. While under his cloak, he waited until Peter Pettigrew turned up at his parents place, before he walked inside Harry sent the killing curse at him.

'At least Sirius won't be sent to Azkaban, but now he had to make sure Voldemort doesn't find another way into the house which was already under the fidelius charm. First I need to go forward, see if my parents are alive, so again two years, see what happens,' Harry again stayed under his cloak as he spun the time turners, he snuck up to the back of the house and he instantly knew something was wrong, Sirius was sitting with his father, it looked to Harry like he was trying to comfort him. Albus Dumbledore was holding him as a small boy who kept calling for mummy.

'Was it him Albus, did Voldemort kill Lily?' Remus asked softly as he stared at James.

'We believe so, but like always, we can't be positive it wasn't one of his death eaters.'

'You don't think it was Snape do you, since he couldn't have Lily for himself, he decided to kill her?' Sirius asked.

'No, Severus came to me, said he would become a spy for me to find out who killed Lily, he would do anything he could to protect Harry. We know he thought Harry was the boy mentioned in the prophecy, he will try again. I think it's time to hide you somewhere else James, you and Harry.'

Harry stumbled back again, 'No, no, not again,' Harry spun the time turners again arriving down in the orchard of the Burrow, 'Okay, so I need another plan, but what, I have to stop them dying, how,' Harry kept thinking until he stepped inside.

'Another long day at the cemetery Harry, this isn't good for you,' Molly said sadly.

'I know, but for now I need it Mrs. Weasley. I'll just clean up,' Harry hurried up the stairs again stashing his time turners into his ruck sack before sitting on his bed.

'Harry, are you feeling okay.'

'No, you know that Ginny.'

'I'm not talking about Severus, I mean you look a little sick, you're pale and you looked like you lost weight, but you're eating.'

'I feel fine, health wise, I'm not sleeping well, so maybe that's all it is.'

'Maybe, when are you going to start looking for a house?'

'Trying to get rid of me Gin?'

Ginny scowled, 'No, I just think it might do you good to have your own place. You know Luna and I will visit all the time, Hermione and Ron when they return, even Charlie might.'

'You and Luna want somewhere private to shag each other, that's all, Charlie, he's been giving me looks, looks I'm not interested in.'

'We told Charlie that it's too soon for you to think about dating.'

'I'm not going to again, ever, I can't go through this again. Sev was my life, I gave everything to him, I'm not doing it again.'

'Maybe, but maybe in a few years that might change. Anyway, come down for dinner, you look like you can use some food.'

Harry sighed, then put his picture of Sev back on the side cupboard then followed Ginny down to the kitchen. His mind was going over different scenarios, trying to work out how to keep his parents, and Sirius alive before he made sure Severus lived. He never noticed the looks aimed at him by Arthur, Molly, Charlie or Ginny who all had the same look, they were worried.

The following day Harry tried again, stopping Severus hearing the prophecy and he killed Pettigrew, then decided to hang around for a while to see if something happened now before checking the future. For a full day Harry checked on his parents, him as a baby, Sirius and Remus, nothing, everything seemed fine, so he left Godric's Hollow and headed to Spinners End. He cast a human revealing spell which told him there was one human inside, he didn't knock this time, he decided to stand across the street for a while. Once it got dark Severus stepped out of his house, looked around then hurried away. Harry followed under his cloak until Severus disapparated, so Harry decided it was time to check a year along, to make sure everyone was alive.

Harry finished spinning then staying under his cloak he checked on his parents, found both alive sitting on the floor reading him as a baby a story. Sirius and Remus were talking quietly while they sat on the sofa. Harry left Godric's Hollow and headed to Spinner's End. He cast his charm which told him no one was inside the house, so Harry using the elder wand, let himself inside. He walked quietly through the house and the first thing he noticed was dust, everything was dusty like no one had been here in a while.

'Maybe Sev was now at Hogwarts, I could check, use the tunnel from the shrieking shack,' Harry shuddered as he remembered the last time he had been in there, 'No, the tunnel at Honeydukes, but I would need to sneak in through the day,' Harry decided to look around Severus' home a bit while he was there. He had been there once, during his real time, they made love in Severus' bedroom, stayed in there talking for a couple of hours before heading back to Hogwarts. Harry knew it would be painful to see that room, to remember, but he couldn't stop himself walking to the door. Harry stood staring at the closed door for a few minutes before opening it.

'No,' Harry cried seeing the decomposing body of his love, 'Sev,' Harry knelt down next to Severus' body and even though he was decomposing, Harry gently touched his face, 'I will change this, you will live.'

Harry kissed Severus' shrunken and almost gone lips before leaving the house. He again found the same dark alley way where he reversed time. When Harry arrived he fell to the ground, feeling sick and light headed. Everyone kept saying he didn't look well, now he didn't feel well and wondered if travelling back in time was affecting him. But Harry wasn't going to stop, not until he made sure Severus lived but hopefully his parents and Sirius lived as well.

Harry pushed himself to his feet, then slowly walked to the house, 'Harry, what happened?' Ginny asked as she helped Harry inside.

Harry just shook his head before he moved around Ginny and headed upstairs to his room.

'He can't go on like this and now he looks worse that he did when he left. Maybe we should take him to see a healer,' Arthur said.

'He won't go, you know how stubborn he is. But he's not going to the cemetery like he told us, so where is he going?'

'Two places, either his parent's house in Godric's Hollow, or wherever Severus lived. Maybe I could ask Kingsley to find out where that was. We could split up, see which house he turns up at.'

'He might be using his cloak, if he does we'd never see him. We know he's taking it with him, we checked, it's not here,' Charlie said.

'Yes, that will be a problem. I just don't know what to do to help him through this.'

'Maybe when Hermione and Ron return tomorrow, they'll be able to help,' Molly said, 'They might even be able to get Harry to see a healer because he does need to see one.'

'Let's hope they can help Molly dear, because I'm running out of idea's. It's like Harry has given up and has no will left, no will to live.'

'He said he was never going to date, he didn't want to go through this again. That is one thing I know for sure, he won't see anyone, he'll stay alone, if he survives this and right now I'm not sure he will. But we can't give up, we have to do something to help him,' Ginny sighed as she stared at her parents and brother, all looked just as worried as she did, all wondered if anyone could get through to Harry, try to make him live.


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter ten

The next day Harry tried again, everyone was alive because he took out Voldemort as a student. He kept watching over the next few years until Lucius Malfoy ended up becoming what Voldemort would have become if he lived. Harry travelled five years into the future where Dumbledore had organised the order of the phoenix again with his parents, Sirius, Remus, McGonagall, the Longbottom's and a heap of others who were working to stop Malfoy and his supporters. Harry thought this time it had worked, then it happened, his parents had died on a mission for the order so he reversed it, again. The following day he tried a different tact again just stopping Pettigrew early, he checked through the years and it all seen fine, but he wanted to be positive before he went to save Sev. Harry checked a few more years until he's other self was sixteen years old, when he arrived he found out Sirius and Remus had been killed.

'No matter what I do they die, or some of them die. I think it's time to just concentrate on keeping Severus alive, but first I want to see my family. Maybe they can help me, maybe they can suggest something. But I have to go back a year or so or Sirius and Remus would still be dead. If I can't save everyone then I want to spend some time with my family.'

Harry turned one of the time turners the opposite way until he was two years previous. He pulled his cloak off and walked towards the house in Godric's Hollow, his house. Harry stared at the closed door before he finally knocked. It only took a second before Harry heard footsteps.

'Who is it?'

'Um, if I say you won't believe me, but I'm not here to hurt any of you, I need help, you're help and Dumbledore's help,' Harry called through the door.

'That voice sounds family,' Sirius said.

'It sounds like James, sort of,' Lily said.

James glanced around, 'Wands ready, just in case because whoever this is was able to get through the fidelius charm,' James waited until Lily, Sirius, Remus and Harry took their wands out before he opened the door a crack, 'Oh fuck.'

'Yeah, but it's really me, from your future, my past. Can I come in, I really need to talk to you?'

'Just know everyone will keep their wands on you.'

'Good, it's the smart thing to do and as you can see, I don't have mine on me, but it's in my pocket.'

James opened the door, the older Harry stepped inside to loud gasps, 'Blimey, that's Harry.'

'He looks sick, what's wrong with him?' Lily asked.

'Now tell us, who are you and why are you here?' James asked.

'I'm Harry James Potter, your son, him basically,' Harry pointed, 'I came back to change things, to stop people dying, but every time I do someone dies, nothing works. Do you mind if I sit, I'm a bit tired?'

'Sure,' James said keep his wand on Harry, 'Can you prove you are who you say you are?'

'The prophecy, Dumbledore heard it, told you, that's why you're under the fidelius charm. But you see, I tried everything, one time I took care of Voldemort, I went back and killed him when he was a kid at Hogwarts. But Lucius Malfoy took over, so I tried again and again, someone always dies.'

'Do you know what the prophecy said?'

'Yeah, I can tell you if you want, I just don't like to think about it, but…dad, you used to hoist Snape up by his ankles, one day you took his pants off in front of other students and teachers, mum, you grew up with him, you were best friends until he called you a mudblood, he did that because he was embarrassed. Um, what else, dad is an animagi stag called Prongs, Sirius is a large dog called Padfoot, Remus is a werewolf called moony, you call yourselves the Marauders, mum's patronus is a doe, my patronus is a stag I call Prongs. Oh my wand, it's the same as the other Harry is holding, holly with a phoenix feather core, Fawkes, Dumbledore's phoenix is where the feather came from. Can I take it out to show you?'

'Slowly.'

Harry slowly and carefully pulled out his phoenix feather wand, 'See, it's the same, oh I have the invisibility cloak as well,' Harry pulled a bit out from his jacket, 'I also have the map of Hogwarts, It's really me, just not yours, sort of.'

'I think I need a drink,' Sirius said.

'I could use a dozen,' Harry sighed.

'I think we all can, but can you please put that wand away?'

'Sure,' Harry stuck his wand in his back pocket, 'Do you know Mad-eye Moody?'

'Yes, he's an auror.'

'Told me not to put my wand in my back pocket that people have lost buttocks from doing that, we all thought it was funny thinking about creepy Mad-eye missing part of his arse.'

'Language Harry,' Lily scolded.

Harry laughed, 'Sorry, but I'm being scolded by my mother for swearing, that's never happened before.'

'I think you need to start from the beginning,' James handed Sirius, Remus, Lily and Harry a drink but all of them seemed surprised when he knocked it straight back, 'Done that a lot have you?'

'Multiple times a day, only got drunk once, it's nice, pricy, same one I buy. Okay, beginning, I suppose I should start with the fact that Voldemort knew I was the one the prophecy meant, Pettigrew the lying piece of shit, he was a death eater, told Voldemort which got him through the fidelius charm. He killed dad downstairs, mum tried to protect me, she died upstairs,' Harry lifted his hair, 'I survived the killing curse and was called the boy who lived, famous around the magical world. You know, maybe you could get Dumbledore here so I don't have to tell this more than once?'

'I think we might need Dumbledore to work all this out. Lily can you contact him, maybe Mad-eye as well.'

'Yes, I won't be long,' Lily stared at her Harry then the other Harry, 'How old are you?'

'Just turned eighteen, last week actually.'

'Hang on, you can't be eighteen, you look so much older, you have wrinkles,' Sirius said.

'I've had a tough life. Do you mind if I have another drink?'

'Sure,' James poured Harry another drink then sat beside his son, 'It's uncanny, you two do look the same, you just look older, a lot older.'

'How old are you?' Harry asked the younger Harry.

'Fourteen, I came home at the end of the school year.'

'Have McGonagall for transfiguration?'

'Yeah, I do, did you?'

'Yep, she's headmistress now, Dumbledore's dead, like so many others.'

'How did I die Harry?'

Harry turned, 'Dumbledore,' Harry stood up, 'Blimey it's good to see you, no matter how angry I am with you.'

'It seems we had our differences. Why did you use a time turner, that's dangerous?'

'To fix things, I can't go on without him Dumbledore, he was the world to me. I figured if I was going to come back to make sure my husband lived then I'd try to make sure my family lived as well.'

'You're gay?' James asked then saw his real son lower his head.

'Yeah, I am.'

'I think you should start from the beginning and I have a feeling this is going to take a while. Maybe a cup of tea would be nice Lily.'

'Alright Albus, but are you sure it's really Harry?'

'Oh yes, it's Harry, just from a different time. So I died, how?'

'Um, you accidentally cursed your hand, Severus stopped it from killing you but said it would spread, he gave you a year to live. So you worked on some plans then asked Severus to kill you at the right time, it would save Draco Malfoy's soul, protect me and keep Voldemort believing Severus was his spy, not yours. So just after I turned sixteen, you and I returned from looking for something, you were weak, I apparated you back, the dark mark was over the castle. We got brooms from Rosmerta, flew into the school, to the astronomy tower. Death eaters were in the school. You had the order there to keep everyone safe, I contacted the DA to do the same. So a huge fight was going on down in the school, my DA, your order all fighting death eaters. They got through to us, they were making Draco Malfoy kill you, but he couldn't, he lowered his wand. When Severus turned up, you called to him, Severus, please, he sent the killing curse at you. I was under my cloak, petrified, you used the petrifying charm on me to keep me safe, so I had to watch it even though I knew it was going to happen. Sev looked so heartbroken that he had to kill you and he knew I was there somewhere watching, but he had to keep up his pretence of being a death eater.'

'He is a death eater,' Mad-eye said.

'He was a death eater, he changed sides, became Dumbledore's spy and my husband.'


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter eleven

'You're married to that greasy haired Voldemort lover?' Sirius said looking disgusted.

'He's not, not in my world. I changed everything, don't you see. My parents were murdered by Voldemort when I was fifteen months old, Pettigrew set you up Sirius, you end up in Azkaban because everyone believed you were Voldemort's spy. Dumbledore had Hagrid get me from the destroyed house and take me to him, at the Dursley's.'

'No, you can't go there,' Lily yelled.

'I did end up there, ended up being beaten, starved, sexually abused, for years that happened.'

'Why did I leave you there if they did that to you?'

'You never knew, I didn't tell you because you explained about the blood protection I had. Okay, let's start from where I survived the killing curse at fifteen months old and called the boy who lived. Voldemort disappeared that night, but he wasn't dead, he just had no body left, so he vanished. You always knew he would return, just not when, so you needed to keep me safe since the prophecy said I would kill him or he would kill me, not in those words but the meaning is the same,' Harry took another sip of his drink, 'You said a blood protection was the safest, since my mother died trying to save me, living with her blood kept me safe, safe from Voldemort, just not safe from them. I had no one growing up, locked in a cupboard, that's where I lived and slept, the cupboard under the stairs. I used to cook for them from the age of six, if anything went wrong, usually caused by their son Dudley the fat fuck Vernon used to drag me by the hair into the garage, beat the shit out of me. I didn't know my parents name, I didn't even know my own name, they called me boy, you, freak, freak was their favourite word, I didn't even know I was a wizard, not until Hagrid came to get me when I was eleven.'

'Why didn't I get you if I placed you there?'

'You were busy running the school, trying to find out what Voldemort used as his horcrux.'

'His what?' Mad-eye yelled suddenly.

'He made horcruxes, plural, seven actually. But from the time I arrived at Hogwarts he was still trying to kill me. He used a professor, Quirrell, Voldemort's soul or whatever was on the back of his head, under his turban. I almost died a dozen times that year, Severus kept saving me without me knowing but I did kill Quirrell and Voldemort disappeared, again. Second year was just as bad, but it wasn't the old Voldemort but his memory. He opened the chamber of secrets after possessing the sister of my best friend. I went to save her, killed the basilisk with the sword of Gryffindor, but a fang pierced my arm,' Harry pulled up his sleeve, 'I was dying, so was Ginny, Tom Riddle as he was called when he was young, he laughed, thought it was funny that Dumbledore's great defender was dying. Fawkes came to me, he was the one that gave me the sword, but he dropped his tears into my arm, saved me. I stabbed the diary that was a horcrux and what had possessed Ginny, stabbed it with the fang, Voldemort disappeared. Lucius Malfoy went to kill me that night, Dobby the house elf saved me. Third year Sirius escaped from Azkaban, everyone thought he was coming to kill me. We found out the truth one night, after I heard Trelawney make another prophecy, servant and master will reunite. At first I thought it meant Sirius, but it was Pettigrew, he escaped that night. Severus saved me, Hermione and Ron when Remus changed into his werewolf. You told Hermione to use her time turner to save Sirius and Buckbeak the hippogriff.'

'Why would this Hermione have a time turner?'

'Hermione is smart, the smartest witch around, she got permission to use it for her extra classes, twice as many as I was taking. Hermione should be at Hogwarts, she's the same age as me, in Gryffindor even though with her brains she could have been in Ravenclaw. Anyway, we saved Buckbeak from having his head chopped off, he saved us from Remus, then we flew him up to where Sirius was being held before being given to the dementors. Oh I saved Sirius from having his soul sucked out earlier that night, my patronus kept us safe from about a hundred dementors who were around the school for protection. Anyway, the following year the triwizard tournament was on, so we couldn't play quidditch, I was seeker, got that my first year ended up captain in my sixth. A death eater got hold of Mad-eye who was supposed to be the defence teacher that year, he put my name in the cup. By the third task and with a lot of help from the fake Mad-eye, Cedric and I helped each other, he was the other Hogwarts champion, we won and was transported to a cemetery where Pettigrew was waiting with what was Voldemort at the time, this little disgusting thing. I was bound to a tombstone of Voldemort's father, muggle father. Pettigrew performed this dark ritual, bone of the father, flesh of the servant and blood of the enemy,' Harry pulled up his other sleeve to show the long jaggered scar, 'Voldemort returned, sort of snake like, he tortured me for a while, his death eaters were there, laughing while I screamed. Then he wanted us to duel to prove to his followers that I wasn't powerful, that I was nothing.'

Everyone noticed Harry staring into his glass as he spoke, but he sounded so lifeless, like what he was saying meant nothing.

'Our wands connected, mum and dad came out of his wand, echoes you called them. They gave me time to get back to the cup which was a port key. I took Cedric's body with me, he died beside me. We got back to the castle, the fake Mad-eye took me to the castle while you spoke with Cedric's parents. Mad-eye tried to kill me, but you, McGonagall and Severus saved me, Severus gave Mad-eye some veritaserum and we found out it was a death eater that faked his death with the help of his parents, Barty Crouch Jr. Sirius was at the castle, in his dog form as everyone still believed he was a supporter of Voldemort. You explained what I saw, mum and dad, then asked me to tell you what happened in the cemetery, how Voldemort looked, then you took me up to the hospital wing. I could barely stand, bleeding from numerous places, aching all over. Madame Pomfrey gave me a dreamless sleep potion, taste like shit, had that a few times. The minister then didn't believe you when you told him Voldemort had returned. Fifth year he put this bitch in Hogwarts as the defence teacher, all she did was torture us, me more than most because I yelled at her, told her Voldemort was back. She was just as sadistic as Voldemort,' Harry held out his hand to Dumbledore, 'She thought making me carve into my own hand I must not tell lies would make me stop saying Voldemort had returned. You were driven out of the castle, Umbridge, the bitch, she ended up headmistress. All of us were basically prisoners, McGonagall tried to help us, but she couldn't. Later that year I got a vision of Voldemort torturing Sirius so I went with some friends to save him in the department of mysteries, but no Sirius, no Voldemort, but plenty of death eaters. I had told Severus without anyone knowing what I said, I said he has Padfoot in the place it was hidden, he told you, you arrived with the order. But we were holding our own against the death eaters, I was up again Lucius Malfoy and Rodolphus Lestrange when Sirius stepped up beside me, punch Lucius in the mouth while I kept Lestrange busy. Bellatrix hit Sirius in the chest with the killing curse, he fell through the veil. You bound all the death eaters but Bellatrix who ran, I ran after her, tried to curse her but all I could see was Sirius' face. Voldemort turned up, both of you duelled destroying the atrium in the process but the minister and aurors got to see Voldemort, that we had been telling the truth. You sent me back to your office where I swore at you, broke your things, you sat there letting me do it. I was heartbroken that Sirius died, Sev comforted me, as much as he could before I ended up back in the hospital in the Harry Potter bed. Madame Pomfrey designated a bed just for me since I end up in there all the time. Sixth year is worse, you die and I'm left to find the horcruxes, Severus is made headmaster as Voldemort had control over our world. He kept the students alive, they might have been hurt, but the death eaters wanted to kill some of them, he made sure they didn't die, he was so brave, he was everything,' Harry wiped a stray tear from his cheeks before taking another sip, but there wasn't a sound to be heard from the others in the room, not after hearing this tragic, dangerous and sad story that wasn't over.


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter twelve

Harry continued his story from his sixth year, how Dumbledore died, how he left with his friends to find the rest of the horcruxes, how everyone went into hiding, the ones that could, especially the order. Harry explained that he figured out one was at Hogwarts so Aberforth Dumbledore helped them through a tunnel from his pub to the room of requirement where some of his friends had been hiding. All Harry wanted to do was see Severus, but he knew he couldn't risk it, so he started to look for the horcrux. McGonagall secured the castle and got the staff organised after Severus made it look like he killed two death eaters by accident before leaving. Hundreds of death eaters, snatchers, giants and dementors turned up with Voldemort, lots of order members, the DA and older students started fighting. After all but the snake horcrux had been destroyed Harry explained how he looked into Voldemort's mind and found him in the shrieking shack with the snake. When they got there Voldemort told Nagini to kill Severus.

'I couldn't stop it, Voldemort left so I kept pressure on Sev's neck, trying to stop the bleeding, but his blood flowed through my fingers. He wanted me to take his memories, then he stared into my eyes and I saw it, saw his life leave him, saw my everything disappear and all I could do was watch,' Harry knocked back the rest of his drink before continuing, 'Ron and Hermione went in to be with the rest of the Weasley's, to be with Fred, but I couldn't stand to be with them. They had been there for me for years, supported me, looked after me and I got Fred killed. So I ran, ran all the way up to your office to use the pensieve. You told Sev to tell me something, but he had to wait until Voldemort feared for the life of his snake. The night he killed my parents and tried to kill me he planned to make another horcrux, his sixth, the snake was the Seventh. When he said the killing curse his soul split but because of mum he disappeared and his soul entered me. The only way for Voldemort to die was if I died first. I wanted to die, I wanted to go to Sev, to go to Sirius, to my parents, I had no one, no family. So I walked into the forbidden forest and surrendered to him. He didn't kill me straight away, he kept staring at me. Finally he lifted the wand and I saw it, saw the green light heading towards me, I closed my eyes and welcomed death,' Harry wiped another tear from his cheek, 'We were both knocked out, when we came to I pretended to be dead, I needed to kill the snake. He took his frustrations out on me, cruciatus curse, he likes to use that, the flung me up in the air, let me fall, did that a few times before he made Hagrid carry me back to the castle, with the winning side. Voldemort amplified his voice and told everyone their hero was dead. He blamed me you know, blamed me for everyone dying, I blamed myself, I blamed you, I even blamed Sev. Everyone was looking to me to save them and I couldn't. I was so angry with you, if you told me sooner, I would have surrendered to him sooner, it might have saved more. He decided to torture my friend Neville, Neville kept breaking his silencing charm, saying Dumbledore's army, that's what the DA stood for, we were your army. While everyone concentrated on Neville I slipped the cloak on and started to stun death eaters, all I wanted to do was kill them. The fight started again, Charlie Weasley brought hundreds more people who all heard I was dead. The death eaters started to fall under the weight of people, but the centaurs came out to help when they heard I was dead, the hippogriff led by Buckbeak, Kreacher brought all the Hogwarts house elves to fight for me. Finally there was only Bellatrix and Voldemort left. Bellatrix just missed Ginny with the killing curse, Molly Weasley killed her, and Voldemort, his anger was terrible. I pulled my cloak off to shocked looks and shouts of his alive,' Harry sighed, 'I spoke to Voldemort, told him to try for some remorse, that all his horcruxes were gone. But what shocked him the most was when I said we duel on skill alone, he said and you expect to win, I said one of us was leaving this world forever, I had hoped it was me, but I wanted him gone so no more would suffer. He killed thousands of people, from the time he was a kid. The sunrise burst through the busted walls of the great hall, he said the killing curse, I said the disarming charm, the spells met and rebounded onto him, he fell dead. All I wanted was to die as well, to go to Sev, to go to my family, to leave all the pain and all the suffering. My friends are worried about me, Mr. and Mrs. Weasley think I'm sick and wants me to see a healer, I'm not sick, I just don't want to live anymore. So I thought I'd try one more thing, go back in time and change what happened. I figured if I can stop Sev going to the shrieking shake he would live and we'd have our family. But I wanted Sirius, my parents, I wanted it all. I never got anything I wanted, my life was out of my hands from the time that prophecy was made, it's been hard and painful. So I thought since I was here and before I reversed it I would get to know my parents, a little, then go save Sev.'

'That is a very sad story Harry, but if you try going back in time once more you could die. Can't you feel it Harry, feel it inside you, you're dying right now, we can all see it.' Dumbledore said kindly.

'I don't care, I can't go on without him, he's the only thing that made my life worth living. If I can go see him but I die, then I die with him and we'll be together and I won't suffer any more.'

'Harry, don't you realise what could happen if you die,' Albus knelt down in front of Harry, 'The other Harry could die at the same time, he is you.'

Harry lifted his head to see his parents both holding the other Harry, 'I can't let anyone else die, I have enough blood on my hands. I'll reverse it, but not go back. Can you tell me a bit about your life, about you, anything?'

'Whatever you want to know Harry,' James said sadly.

'Then stay for another hour, hear the things you want to hear then I will escort you back. I can see how weak you are, you probably suffer from severe headaches, you get sick a lot, light headed, maybe faint.'

'I'm always sick, always have a headache, I fainted the other day when I was at the cemetery.'

'That should tell you how sick you are, once more and you would die. When you reverse it you will probably pass out, that is why I will be with you until you do go back to your time.'

'I wish I could see Sev once more, but he's dead now in this world. I was going to change things to save him in both worlds.'

'You can't, it would cost both your lives. Now talk to your parents while you have time, I'll be in the kitchen,' Dumbledore patted Harry's cheek, 'We must have been close.'

'We were, spent a lot of time together, I came to think of you as a grandfather. After losing my parents, Sirius, all I had was you and Sev, you performed our ceremony in your office,' Harry pulled out his wallet, 'Then you took this picture.'

Albus took the small picture, 'Severus is smiling in this, but I can see the love you both have for each other. Do you know Harry that the magic of love "is the most powerful magic in our world" Harry said at the same time making Albus smile, 'It seems I've said that to you before.'

'A few times, I had hoped my love for Sev would have saved him, but it wasn't enough.'

'Talk to your parents and Sirius, get to know them,' Albus stood and walked away with Mad eye leaving this poor young man with the family he never knew. Albus wondered if there was anything he could do to help. But if what he said was true, then he was already dead in Harry's world, so maybe giving him this time is what will help.


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter thirteen

Harry had not stopped talking to his parents and Sirius when he noticed Dumbledore walk back in. Harry slowly stood trying to keep his balance, then he face the other Harry.

'So you're fourteen, fifteen about that right?'

'Fourteen, I told you before.'

'Sorry, I can't keep a lot straight at the moment. So you're average in class, nothing exceptional?'

Harry shrugged, 'I suppose.'

'Then let me show you something. If Dumbledore is right and he usually is then you are me,' Harry moved his hand and Prongs leapt forth, 'Wandless magic and a patronus, not many people can do those without a wand. You have the power inside you, you just need to bring it out. I had no choice but to do things I was too young for, I even used unforgivables, not something I'm proud of. Look inside yourself and you will find what you need, oh and since you are gay like me, first time, expect it to be uncomfortable, make sure he uses the right charms,' Harry turned to his mother, 'I always knew you would be beautiful, I was right,' Harry hugged her and smiled when Lily hugged him back, 'Try not to be too overprotective of him, he needs to experience life.'

'I can take your advice, to a certain extent.'

Harry turned to his father and hugged him, 'Show your son that playful side that used to be around when you were a student, he needs that right now.'

James laughed, 'I can do that,' he let Harry go.

'Oh and the one thing I always dreamed about if I had my family, was to have siblings, I think it's time you got mum knocked up.'

The other Harry and Sirius laughed loudly before Harry hugged his godfather, 'He needs you, they all do, not just the serious side of Sirius Black, but the playful side.'

'It's been difficult to bring that out, but I will try to do it more Harry.'

Harry turned to Remus and hugged him, 'Find an auror named Nymphadora Tonks, she's your wife, I'm godfather to your son, Teddy. She might have bright pink hair or purple hair, she's a metamorphmagus, she is one of the best people I know, if not a little clumsy. But you love her, she loves you Remus, she even loves Moony.'

'I might see what I can do Harry.'

Harry stepped away from his family, 'Thank you, for sharing a bit of yourselves with me.'

'It's time to go Harry, you're getting weaker by the minute.'

'Try to find another to love, everyone needs someone,' Lily smiled.

'No, I will join Sev, eventually.'

'Come on Harry, let's go,' Dumbledore put his arm around Harry and they headed out into the back garden, 'You need to apparate me this time, since you know where we are going.'

'Okay,' Harry stared back at his family, 'I love you,' Harry kept a tight hold on Dumbledore then turned on the spot arriving down the back of the Burrow, at the back of the orchard. He staggered and felt like he was going to be sick, but felt Dumbledore hold him up, 'I wish you didn't need to die, maybe you could have made a difference, helped me stop so many people dying.'

'I wish I could have stayed with you right until the end, but it was not meant to be. Now when you reverse time you will probably pass out, make sure you're close enough that someone will find you.'

'I will and I know doing this means you're gone again, that their all gone. But I saw the fear on their faces, I don't think they realised what it actually meant.'

'No, but it will, they might even know by now. Try to live Harry, after everything I've heard you do deserve to life.'

'Without Sev, I can't, he gave me something worth living for. Thanks Dumbledore, for everything you did for me over the years, I never told you how much I appreciated it and I should have told you, I should have told you all the time.'

'You're welcome, now go, before you pass out now, you can barely stand,' Albus watched Harry walk through the orchard. He hopes that the magic he performed at the Potters would work, that type of magic was hard to predict so he could not be positive of anything, he just hoped that young man survived.

Harry stood staring at the Burrow, he pulled the time turner out, 'Goodbye Sev, I tried, I tried everything, but you never know, we might meet up sooner than you think,' Harry turned the time turner and the moment he stopped spinning he hit the ground.

Inside the Burrow, Ginny, Hermione and Ron were pacing, Arthur, Molly and the Grangers were trying to get those three to sit down and relax.

'He's been disappearing a lot, he'll turn up, just like always. Wearing yourself out won't help Harry,' Arthur said.

'He could be hurt, what if those that escaped found him while he's sick, he could be dead. I need some air,' Hermione said then hurried from the house.

'Go make sure she doesn't leave,' Arthur said, 'Harry will turn up.'

'He better or I might just hex him for putting us through this,' Ron stepped out of the house to see Hermione pacing, 'Hermione, I'm sure he's fine,' Ron sighed as he moved closer, putting his arms around his girlfriend, 'What's that?'

'What's what?'

'Down there,' Ron said pointing.

Hermione turned, 'It's Harry,' Hermione and Ron took off, 'Let's get him inside.'

Ron could see Hermione was too upset so he took his wand out and levitated Harry into the house.

'Where did you find him?' Arthur asked.

'Outside, he needs a healer.'

'I'll contact Poppy, put him on the sofa,' Molly said urgently.

'He looks worse than when he left two days ago,' Ginny said as Ron floated Harry down onto the sofa.

'It looks like he hasn't eaten in weeks,' Hermione said brushing Harry's hair from his face, 'What have you been doing Harry?'

'Hermione,' Poppy said then moved in to examine Harry, 'He's badly dehydrated, there is nothing in his system at all, no food, but my results show he hasn't eaten in weeks,' Poppy kept her wand moving, 'Oh dear, he has some damage to his brain, but I can't tell how much until he wakes,' Poppy poured three potions into his mouth, 'I'm not sure if he will make it, all we can do is keep treating him and hope.'

'Let's get him up to his bed,' Arthur said.

'I'll take him,' Charlie gently slipped his arms under Harry and lifted him into his arms, 'He weighs less than a child,' Charlie headed upstairs with everyone following, 'You girls stay out here while we get him comfortable.'

Arthur waited until Charlie placed Harry on the bed, then with help from his two sons undressed Harry, placing his clothes, cloak and wands on the end of the bed, but they saw what was hanging around his neck.

'Time turners, he's been going back in time to try to change things,' Arthur gently took the time turners from around Harry's neck, 'I'll get these to Kingsley, but I should have suspected. Harry asked me a while ago about going back in time to change things so Fred didn't die.'

'He went to save Snape, but why does he look like this?' Ron asked.

'Travelling through time can damage a person, that's why they only allow one trip per person. They study the passed in the hope they can prevent similar things happening in the future. It drains the body completely, if Harry kept going he would have died. I'll let the others in then contact Kingsley,' Arthur opened the door and held up the time turners.

'That's what Harry's been doing, going back in time?' Minerva asked.

'Yes, how often I have no idea. We have to wait until he wakes. I'm going to contact Kingsley so he can collect these or Harry just might try again,' Arthur moved around the others then headed downstairs, he stuck his head in the fireplace, threw some powder then waited until his head stopped spinning. He explained to Kingsley what's been going on with Harry and about the time turners. Kingsley explained he would be there tomorrow, to hide those time turners until he got there. Arthur removed himself from the fireplace and as he glanced around he saw someone at his door that he never thought he would see, someone that was supposedly dead, someone that just might make a difference to Harry.


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter fourteen

Arthur and his guest walked up the stairs to the room Harry was in, he opened the door to see Hermione and Ginny sitting on the side of the bed, Ron was sitting in a chair with Charlie beside him and Molly hovering like she always did. Minerva and Poppy were talking quietly on the other side of the room.

'Oh my,' Molly gasp, 'but how?'

'I'm not quite sure Molly, I just found myself waking up in my old room then found a vial full of memories, with Albus' writing on the side,' Severus moved to the bed, 'How is he?'

'Not good Severus, I don't even know if he'll wake.'

Severus sat down on the edge of the bed then brushed his lips over Harry's, 'Hey my love, whatever you did worked, I'm here, now you just have to come back to me.'

'Did Arthur tell you what he'd been doing?'

'Yes, so I was thinking back, there were times when I sense someone watching me, someone even knocked on my door one night, but when I opened it no one was there, again I sensed someone was close. It must have been Harry, in my past.'

'He's been depressed professor, but it was more to do with the fact he couldn't save you,' Hermione said sadly.

'Let's go out and give Severus some time alone with Harry,' Arthur suggested.

'If you need me Severus, I'll be downstairs.'

'Thank you Poppy,' Severus never took his eyes from Harry.

'Oh, you might want this professor,' Ginny handed him the chain with the ring on it.

'I asked Harry to keep them on him so Voldemort never figured out the truth. Thank you,' Severus took the ring from the chain and slipped it onto his finger. When he heard the door close, Severus kicked off his shoes, climbed onto the bed and pulled Harry to him so his head was resting on his chest, like it had done many times before, 'Come back to me love, you're actions saved me, now it's time to start that life we talked about.'

Arthur, Minerva, Poppy, Charlie, the Grangers, Hermione, Ron and Ginny were sitting at the table while Molly made tea.

'Is there a chance he'll be okay Madame Pomfrey?' Hermione asked in a choked voice.

'Right now I can't say, I have to wait until he wakes before I can assess him further. Why did he do it, risk everything to change the past which could have changed this time?'

'We won't know that until he wakes. We all knew he was suffering. He was quiet, would sit by himself all the time, we'd see him wipe tears from his eyes and he started drinking, a lot. I found him down here every night, standing at the door, staring out with a glass of firewhiskey in his hand.'

'We tried everything, Charlie even wanted to date Harry.'

'Just to cheer him up, I think of Harry as a little brother.'

'How old is he?' Jean Granger asked.

'Eighteen, he just turned eighteen,' Ron said softly, 'Hard to believe but Hermione and I are older than him, yet he looks at least ten years older.'

'He has wrinkles,' Frank Granger said.

'He's had a very hard life, from a young age, that's why he was desperate to do this, to try anything he could to have Severus back,' Arthur said.

'Do you think he would have kept trying?' Ginny asked.

'Yes, I do, he wanted professor Snape, if he did anything else we won't know until he wakes up,' Hermione said sadly, 'I can't believe he would risk that.'

'So magical people can go back in time?' Jean asked.

'No, we do have the means but they are only used under strict guidelines. We have people at our ministry that do go back, they study the past in the hope that can prevent certain things happening in the future. They only allow each person one trip, they spend a day studying what they can then return. Hermione was given one in her third year and only to use for her classes.' Minerva explained.

'I took extra classes, but they overlapped, so I went to see professor McGonagall who got permission from the ministry for me to use an hour time turner. I would turn back time every hour and do my other classes. I never told Ron or Harry that I had it, they didn't know until the end of the year when we used it to save Sirius, Harry's godfather. He died two years later.'

'So he really lost everyone?' Frank asked.

'His parents died when he was a baby, Sirius died when he was fifteen, Albus died when he was sixteen and Severus who died a few months ago, but somehow he's here. Harry must have seen Albus in the past.' Arthur said.

'We saw Snape die, Harry was holding his neck where the snake bit him,' Ron said.

'It's time for him to have his potions,' Poppy stood up.

'I'll give you a hand Poppy but I think Severus would prefer to help.' Molly said.

'I'll examine him again while I'm up there,' Poppy headed up the stairs and into the room to see Harry with his head on Severus' chest, 'Did he wake?'

'No Poppy, but this is how Harry likes to lie, with his head on my chest.'

'He needs his potions,' Poppy did some revealing spells then poured two potions into his mouth before doing her spells again, 'The potions are working, but I still can't say what he will be like when he wakes. There is damage to his brain, there are some dark spots and I'm not sure what that means.'

'Is there a chance you can heal his brain for him to be normal or even close to normal?'

'Again, I can't say until he wakes. I don't think that will happen until tomorrow at the earliest. If you are going to help Harry through this Severus then you need to eat and rest.'

'I will Poppy, right now I want to stay with him. I'm trying to let him know I'm here.'

'If he can hear you then he might believe you or he might believe he's dreaming. Let me know if there's the slightest change. Minerva has connected my fireplace to here.'

'You'll hear me if he even moves a toe Poppy.'

'Very well,' Poppy left the room and headed downstairs, 'I need to go make some more potions. But Severus refuses to leave Harry's side. I thought Harry had moved, his head is on Severus' chest, but Severus said Harry likes to lie like that. He will need to eat Molly, maybe you can convince him.'

'If he doesn't want to leave Harry I'll take him up something. Thank you Poppy.'

'I'm going back up, I can't stay down here,' Hermione said then hurried up the stairs with Ron following her.

'It seems my daughter cares for Harry very much,' Frank said.

'She loves him like a brother, he thinks of Hermione as a sister. They are close, closer than siblings, as close as all my children are to Harry.'

'That's how I think of Harry, a brother, a tough little brother that has surprised me for years. Blimey I hope he gets well.' Charlie sighed.

'If anything else changed, would we know about it?' Ginny asked.

'I'm sure we would by now, if not maybe soon. But think of this, the risk he took meant that Voldemort could still be here. Harry once told Albus that he would do anything to be rid of Voldemort, but this could have changed things, it was reckless,' Minerva sighed, 'But he lost everyone, Severus was the last straw for Harry.'

'I thought that Harry might have taken his own life, that has been our biggest concern, so all of us would keep a close eye on him without him knowing. But when he left, saying he was going to the cemetery, we knew he would need privacy, we just never picked up on the fact he was going to the past. If Albus did something so Severus survived, do you think it was Albus that convinced Harry to come back?' Arthur asked.

'If Harry saw Albus, yes, I believe he would have said something to convince Harry. Again we won't know until he wakes up.'

All the people around the table heard the unspoken words, if Harry wakes up, they all thought it but no one wanted to voice their real concerns that Harry may never wake.


	15. Chapter 15

Chapter fifteen

After Poppy and Minerva left, Jean and Frank kept talking to Molly, Arthur and Charlie about Harry. The three Weasley's told the Grangers everything about Harry's life and the danger he always ended up in. They all looked up when the door opened.

'George, we weren't expecting you today,' Molly smiled as she hugged her son.

'Molly, that's not George,' Arthur said as he stood, 'Look, he has both ears.'

Molly let her son go, 'But how did you get your ear back, it was cursed off?'

'Mum, I'm not George, I'm Fred.'

'What?' Charlie blurted out.

'I have no idea how, I'm now sure what happened, but I wake up in a room at the castle. Dumbledore was there, told me something about dying in a big battle at Hogwarts.'

'Albus must have kept you hidden somehow, but George, Percy, Ron, Hermione and Harry saw you die that night. Oh this is going to confuse everyone,' Arthur hugged his son, 'We better let the rest of the family know.'

'You let Bill, Percy and George know, I'll go tell the others,' Charlie hugged Fred then hurried upstairs, 'You are not going to believe what else has happened,' he said as he burst through the door.

'Not more bad news is it Charlie?' Ginny asked who was sitting on the small armchair under the window.

'It's going to be hard to believe, but whatever Dumbledore did that made Snape alive, he also brought…Fred back, he's downstairs.'

'Fred,' Ron and Ginny shouted then ran out of the room, Hermione hurried after them.

'How is he Snape?'

'No change Charlie. I saw how much pain he was in, I remember that. We were in the shrieking shake, he was holding my neck, trying to stop the bleeding. It was there, in his eyes, his suffering,' Severus ran his hand down Harry's stringy and dirty hair.

'We could hardly get a smile out of him, just one or twice, but it looked forced. I never meant it in a romantic way, but I did ask Harry to go out with me. I wanted to try and take his mind off you for a while, cheer him up. Harry's my little brother, I hated to see him hurting like that.'

'So you don't think of Harry in any way but as a brother?'

'No, just a brother, let's hope having the man he loves beside him will save him now.'

'Do you believe he would have killed himself?'

'Yes, we all believed it, we just never voiced our concerns.'

'He was going to after Black died. We talked for hours that night, he saw how much it hurt me that he was going to leave. So he let me help him through the loss of his godfather.'

'Then he would have, if he was going to do that because of Sirius, he definitely would have after losing you. How in the name of merlin did you two end up together?'

'We denied our feelings for a long time. I think that's why I was harder on Harry than I should have been and why Harry looked at me as if I was Voldemort. Then it changed, Harry started to watch me, stare at me, that's when Albus worked it out, how Harry felt. We both opened up that night, told each other everything and even though we both believed we would die, we decided to take that time, take whatever happiness we could get while we could. Charlie, your brother is here, go, I'm watching Harry.'

'Okay, yell if he moves at all.'

'You'll know, watch for my doe patronus.'

'A doe is the mate to a stag, you two really are made for each other,' Charlie stared once more at Harry's unconscious body then headed downstairs to see his whole family gathered around Fred but George was crying into his twin's arms, 'We've had two good things happen because of what Harry did, let's hope our luck didn't run out.'

'I think if Voldemort was back we'd know by now Charlie,' Bill said.

'What if it's not Voldemort, what if it's Bellatrix, her husband, or some of the others?'

'Then we'll hear about it eventually Charlie and do what we have been doing for years, fighting them. We got them before, I'm sure we can do it again. How was Harry when you left?' Arthur asked.

'No change, but Snape told me that Harry was going to kill himself after Sirius died, it was the pain he saw in Snape that stopped him. So this time, he definitely would have done it.'

'Hopefully now Severus is alive it will make all the difference with Harry.' Molly said.

Upstairs, Severus kept his hand moving down Harry's hair, his thoughts on hoping that Harry pulled through. But he also wondered if Harry would believe he was really here or if he would think it was a dream, similar to the dreams he had of Sirius Black.

'Mum smells nice.'

'Harry,' Severus looked down at Harry who hadn't moved.

'Saw him, saw him.'

'Harry, wake up, come on love, wake up.'

'Dreams, mum scolded me, dad thought it was funny.'

'Harry, this is not a dream, please wake up,' Severus took his wand and sent his doe off before looking back at Harry, 'Come on love, wake up.'

'Saw him die, saw him dead.'

Hermione, Ron, Ginny, Arthur and Charlie burst through the door, 'You said he's awake,' Ron said.

'He's talking, not making much sense.'

'She was pretty. Told dad to get her knocked up,' Harry mumbled.

'Mum's contacting Poppy,' Charlie said.

'It sounds like he saw his parents,' Hermione said.

'Unless he's dreaming, but I think you're right Hermione, he's remembering.' Arthur said.

'Let me look at him,' Poppy said as she came through the door with Minerva, Molly, the twins, Bill, Fleur, Percy and the Grangers. They all crowded into the small room watching while Poppy went about her examination, 'He is coming around and those dark patches in his brain are still there, just smaller,' Poppy poured two potions into Harry's mouth.

'Smells nice, smells like home,' Harry mumbled, 'Mum's pretty. Dumbledore, you can help me.'

'Harry love, come on, wake up for me.'

'Saw Sev, saw his body, have to change it.'

'Harry, listen to our voices, Severus is alive, your home,' Poppy said.

'Home is with Sev, home is buried in Sev.'

'Harry, everyone does not need to hear that so wake up,' Severus caressed Harry's drawn face, then ran his thumb over Harry's bottom lip, 'Feel me Harry, I'm right here beside you.'

'Saw Sev, saw his body, his blood was on me.'

'Harry mate, come on, if you want to shag Snape he's right beside you but you have to wake up to do that,' Ron said.

'Buried in him, feel him under me, feel him writhing, screaming, screaming my name.'

'Oh, so you're a screaming Snape?' Charlie smirked.

'Blimey, Snape blushed, what has Harry done to that snarly criticizing sadistic man we all knew?' Fred said making everyone chuckle.

'Harry, you're telling everyone stuff that should be kept private.'

'Maybe that's what you need to do Severus, tell Harry personal things. He said home after I did, so maybe he can hear us,' Poppy said.

'Sev makes me quiver, makes me scream, loves me.'

'I will make you a quivering mess if you will just wake up. Remember what I can do with just a look, you're knees go weak, you start begging, pleading.'

'Has me begging to be touched, begging, please Sev, please bury yourself in me.'

'It worked, he repeated a word, keep going.'

'Harry love, remember when I bound you to the bed, you thought it was funny, not after an hour though, I wouldn't let you go, I wouldn't let you get any relief. Do you remember what you did when I just stood there watching you.'

'Volcano, you laughed, I was embarrassed, volcano.'

'Yes, it looked like a volcano erupting.'

'More than we need to know,' Bill said.

'It's working, so I'm sure we can put up with hearing this.'

'I would not have said that, but Harry, sometimes he doesn't care, he said stuff when Albus was with us,' Severus ran his thumb over Harry's bottom lip, then it was sucked into Harry's mouth, 'Harry, we're not alone love.'

'Hmmm, taste's good, but I want more,' Harry kept sucking and moaning making some in the room blush, others turned away while some others chuckled quietly as they watched Harry suck Severus' thumb.


	16. Chapter 16

Chapter sixteen

'Harry love, you can have more if you wake up.'

'More, feel it, hitting the back of my throat, more, more.'

'If he keeps going something might happen that none of us want to see,' Charlie chuckled.

'Sev, Sev, now, please now.'

'Harry, I will if you open your eyes, you know how I like you to watch.'

'Watch, watch your eyes, stared at your gorgeous body, watch you slide in, watch.'

'Yes, watch, but you have to open your eyes to do that.'

'Hmmm, Sev, want Sev back.'

'You've got me back love, it worked, I'm here.'

'Here, here, under me, here.'

'Anything you want, just open your eyes.'

'Legs around Sev, so big, so big, want, want to feel.'

'You will feel me if you come back to me. Come on love, come back to me,' Severus moved until Harry's head was back on his pillow then Severus kissed him, 'Feel my lips, I'm here, real and alive.'

'Hmmm, lips, tongue, Sev.' just then Harry's head lifted slightly and kissed Severus, not a small brush of the lips but a full on passionate snog with a lot of moaning coming from Harry.

'Is he still dreaming or is he awake?'

'Hard to tell right now Ron, that kiss definitely looks like someone that's awake,' Charlie smirked.

Everyone watched as Severus' head slowly lifted, 'Dreaming, always dreaming.'

'You're not dreaming, if you look around you will see you're not dreaming.'

Harry slowly turned his head and looked at everyone, 'Still dreaming, it's not real.'

'We're real mate so get it through your thick stubborn head,' Ron said.

'No, dreaming, two, two, two,' Harry turned back to Severus, 'I don't want to wake up, I want to stay with you.'

'You are with me and you are awake, but what do you mean two?'

'George, see two of George.'

'It's Fred mate, remember, I lost an ear, Fred didn't.'

Harry turned back, 'Two ears, woman like Hermione, older, pretty.'

'That's my mother Harry, remember, Ron and I went to find them.'

'No, dreaming, saw mum, saw dad, Sirius, mum yelled at me for swearing, the other me thought it was funny.'

'That was not a dream, you went back in time, you tried to change things,' Severus caressed Harry's cheek.

'I found the time turners, I hid them.'

Harry shook his head then his face screwed up, 'Has to be a dream, saw you die, I couldn't go back again.'

'You saw Albus, right?'

'Told Dumbledore everything.'

'Well Albus did something, I woke up in my room at the castle, Fred did as well.'

'I'm not dreaming, please tell me I'm not dreaming Sev.'

'You're not dreaming, you can feel my hand on your face can't you?'

'Yeah, but something's wrong so I don't know if it's real or not.'

'Tell me what's wrong?' Poppy asked.

'Can't feel anything but my head, can't feel my hands, feet, nothing,' Harry grunted, 'Can't lift my hands.'

'You have some brain damage Harry, it's getting better, but it might take a while.'

'So I'll be okay?'

'It's hard to say, but going on how the potions are working, I believe you will.'

'With my luck, probably not,' Harry turned his head again, 'You're really here?'

'Yes, I'm here. But do you remember what you've been saying just before you opened your eyes?'

'Um, no, so what was I saying?'

'Oh you gave all of us an inside to your relationship with Snape. How you like to be buried in him, how he screams your name, hitting the back of your throat, now that's an image I don't need,' Charlie smirked.

'Oh, well it's all true.'

'You see what I mean, he doesn't care who hears what he has to say.'

'What about my body, how long before I can feel anything?'

'That may take some time, once these potions have finished working then I will be able to tell you more. But you will need some extra treatment, your limbs will need to be massaged and once you start to feel it will be painful.'

'Could you show Sev how to do it?'

'It's not difficult, so yes if you would prefer Severus to do it.'

'He is my husband and I love his touch.'

'Kingsley will be dropping by tomorrow,' Arthur said seriously.

'So I'm in trouble?'

'We're not sure what is going to happen. You did steel time turners from the department of mysteries, with the intention of changing the past.'

'It happened once before. I remember reading about this man who went back in time. As he never did anything serious he was only given a year,' Percy said.

Harry turned back to Severus, 'They might lock me up, but you know what, I don't care, not if I have you back.'

'This is serious Harry, what if something has changed that isn't good. Making sure I was alive was a big risk, too risky in my book.'

'But I didn't get to save you, I didn't get to save anyone. Every time I tried someone died, you, mum, then dad and Sirius, Sirius and Remus, then me, the other me, nothing worked.'

'Well Dumbledore sure made it work, we just don't know how or if there is anything that has happened,' Bill said.

'Oh, you mean Voldemort?'

'We don't know Harry, that's why you should not have don't this,' Minerva said, 'Why time turners are restricted.'

'I don't care if he's back and trying to kill me, I need Sev,' Harry turned back to Severus, 'I couldn't go on without you, I was dying inside, one little bit at a time. Oh god Sev.'

Severus pulled Harry into his arms, 'I'm here love. But maybe we should organise to move you to my rooms?'

'As long as I'm with you.'

'Then I'll work on that after you've spoken to Kingsley. It would make sense for you recovery, Poppy can keep treating you, Severus can manipulate your limbs.'

'Arthur, Molly, do you mind me staying tonight?'

'No, of course not Severus, but you will eat,' Molly said.

'I will, in here with Harry.'

'Why did I know he was going to say that?' Ron smirked, 'But you know what Harry, you stink, you have dirt all over you.'

'I was there for a while, I kept going forward to check things, sometimes it was years before someone died again, so I'd reverse it back.'

'Then I think Severus and I should give Harry a sponge bath, which means all of you will have to leave,' Poppy said.

'I will get you everything you need Poppy, everyone else, out. Harry might not mind saying anything about his personal life, but we do not want to see it.'

'That won't happen, I can't feel anything.'

Hermione stepped closer then bent over and hugged Harry, 'You scared me, I don't like to be scared. So don't think I've forgiven you for doing this to us?'

'Oh, I'm in trouble, I'm expecting Sev to punish me, but not Hermione.'

'Oh blimey, now I have that image in my head. Professor Snape with a whip in his hand, agh,' Charlie shuddered.

'Not a whip, but I'm not saying what he uses.'

Everyone either chuckled, grimaced or looked surprised but they didn't look at Harry, they looked at Severus who blushed again making some of the Weasley boys laugh before leaving the room. Molly brought in a large bowl of soap water, a couple of body sponges and another bowl with fresh water before leaving Poppy and Severus to take care of Harry.

'Do you think Harry will get arrested?' Ron asked.

'I can't say Ron, what he did was illegal, Kingsley will tell us tomorrow. But if he turns up alone I think Harry will be okay, if he turns up with an auror, then I think we know the answer.'

'Harry keep saying he doesn't want to be treated differently, but this time I think he should. Look at his life, raised and abused by those relatives. He comes to Hogwarts and almost dies more times than I can count. He has Voldemort after him all the time, he finally meets Sirius but he ends up being killed right in front of Harry, then Dumbledore. We might not have known about Snape, but Harry saw him die, but he tried to stop it. I think Harry was just pushed too far, everyone has their limit, Harry reached his,' Ron said.

Everyone in the kitchen of the Burrow all nodded because what Ron said was right, Harry was pushed to the extreme, to more than most could endure and he couldn't cope with anything, not after losing his one true love, Severus Snape.


	17. Chapter 17

Chapter Seventeen

Severus and Poppy stripped Harry off, Severus sucked in a sharp breath seeing the state Harry was in, how thin he was. Poppy kept herself calm and started to wash Harry, but she let Severus do Harry's private parts.

'Since you are naked I need to see how much damage this did to your brain. Now since Severus is here, I can get him to help.'

'Help with what Poppy?' Severus asked.

'You can't feel anything, that's what you said right Harry?'

'Nothing, just my head, face, all that, but nothing from the neck down.'

'Let's see if some of your body functions are working as they should, then I can either stop one potion or keep going with both.'

'Oh, I think I know what you mean.'

'I don't, so tell me Sev.'

'She wants to know if you can get an erection.'

'Oh, okay, I might not mind saying stuff but I don't want anyone watching that.'

'I will step out for a minute while Severus…takes care of you. Call me and I'll come back in.'

Harry and Severus waited until Poppy closed the door, 'So hand or mouth love?'

'Since this is just to test, just your hand, if I see your head down there and I can't do anything that will piss me right off.'

'Alright,' Severus wrapped his hand around Harry's limp cock and started to slowly move, 'It's got feeling, can you feel it though?'

'No, but it looks good. I'm up, so you might as well stop since we know it worked.'

'You're kidding right,' Severus smirked then lowered his head.

'Sev,' Harry groaned, 'I might not feel it but my memories and imagination works fine. But merlin that looks good,' Harry's eyes never left Severus' lowered head until he stood up with a satisfied look on his face, 'You'll get yours for this Sev, now clean me up before Madame Pomfrey comes back in.'

'Just as bossy as ever Harry, but I have to say, you taste as good as ever,' Severus took the cloth and gently washed Harry, 'Poppy.'

The door opened and Poppy entered, 'So?'

'Everything worked fine, right until the end.'

'I don't see a problem with this Harry, I think you just need more treatment and you'll be fine. Since you can't walk right now, it's best to stay with both potions.'

'It's good to hear I'll get better, thanks Madame Pomfrey.'

'I'll see you tomorrow, I've left your potions with Molly.'

'I'll make sure he takes it Poppy, thank you.'

Poppy left the room and headed downstairs, 'I just had another test performed on Harry, I think he will be fine after some time, I still won't know until the potions finish healing him.'

'What test?' Ron asked.

'That's personal.'

'Oh no, more images,' Ron grimaced.

'Did you do that to Harry?' Charlie smirked.

'No Mr. Weasley, I was outside the door while Severus took care of it. Now I should head back to Hogwarts to make the ointments he will need to help with his recovery.'

'I'll come with you Poppy, get Severus' rooms set up for Harry.'

'Maybe you might find something from Albus which will explain all this,' Arthur said.

'I will look Arthur and I'm glad you're alive Fred. Whatever Albus did is a miracle.'

'Thanks professor, it's not very often I get a kind word from you.'

'Not after all the trouble we caused at Hogwarts.' George grinned.

'Like dung bombs in the toilets,' Minerva smirked, 'I'll see you all tomorrow.'

'So Harry was able to…um, well, let's say that part of him is working fine,' Hermione blushed brightly.

'Yes, it does seem to be,' Arthur said.

'I wonder how Severus did it, hand or mouth?'

'Charlie,' Arthur, Molly, Ron, Hermione and Ginny yelled at the same time making the twins and Bill laugh, but Molly slapped Charlie's head.

'Don't put any more images in my head, I have enough now,' Ron grimaced.

'Let's just have dinner,' Molly shook her head at the antics of her family but she couldn't stop smiling knowing her family were all together again.

The following morning, Arthur, Molly, Charlie, Jean, Frank, Hermione, Ron and Ginny were all sitting at the kitchen table when Kingsley stepped inside with another man.

'Oh no,' Hermione said standing up suddenly, 'Please, he can't be arrested.'

'We have to question him first Hermione, I'm sorry. This is Gawain Robards, the head auror.'

'Do you trust him Kingsley?' Arthur asked.

'With my life and I have a few times over the years.'

'It's just Harry is very suspicious of anyone from the ministry and anyone he doesn't know. I know he was there that day but we were in your office, makes a difference,' Ron said.

'But we know he trusts you Kingsley.'

'We were all talking last night, about everything Harry has been through. He was pushed too far, it's a wonder he didn't snap ages ago,' Charlie said.

'Yes, I know, he's had a hard and sad life, that's why we need to find out everything. Do you have those time turners Arthur?'

'Right here,' Arthur pointed his wand at the cabinet then retrieved the time turners, handing them to Kingsley, 'I'll take you up, but right now Harry can't move his body, only his head.'

'Will he get better?'

'Poppy thinks so, but she's not positive.'

'Lead the way Arthur and I'm sorry, you'll all have to wait down here,' Kingsley, Gawain and Arthur headed upstairs and into the room Harry and Severus were in.

'Harry, Kingsley and Mr. Robards need to question you, I'll be downstairs if you need anything.'

'We'll have to ask you to leave Severus.'

'No, he leaves and I won't say a word, you can throw me in Azkaban for all I care,' Harry tilted his head until he fell onto Severus' chest, 'He's my husband, he stays.'

'Very well, Gawain will be asking the questions.'

'I don't know him, so I don't trust him, I trust you and you were an auror but also in the order of the phoenix member, he wasn't. I might have seen him that day in your office, doesn't mean I trust he's not a supporter. I'm sorry if that sounds harsh but I've been betrayed before.'

The three men all saw Gawain nod, 'Fine, so we know you stole the time turners, probably that day you came to explain everything to us.'

'Yeah, I wasn't escorted out after talking to the Unspeakables, I saw them and I still have no idea why I did it, I've never stolen anything.'

'How many times did you go to the past?'

'Um, about six, seven, I'm not sure exactly.'

'No wonder you can't move, that type of exposure had done a lot of damage, it's going to take a long time for you to recover. So now, you wanted to make sure Severus lived, is that why?'

'Yes, but I never got the chance.'

'Explain why when it's the reason you went to the past?'

'I would check on everyone after changing things, someone always died so I'd reverse it. I stopped the prophecy being overheard, I stopped Pettigrew getting Voldemort through the fidelius charm, I even went back to when Voldemort was a kid and killed him to stop everything, but Malfoy, um, Lucius Malfoy took over and was almost as bad. I tried everything, but either Sev died, my parents died, Sirius, Remus, even my other self died. So I was going to stop Sev being in the shrieking shack but I thought I'd get to talk to my parents first. It took a bit of convincing but a few things I said told them I was telling the truth. Before I started to explain why I went back I had them get Dumbledore, who brought Mad-eye with him. Dumbledore explained a few things which told me I couldn't do it again. So he gave me an hour to talk to my family, then he escorted me back here, left before I reversed it again.'

'I know your life has been hard Harry, but this is still a crime. You could have jeopardised our safety if things changed, like Voldemort returning.'

'I reversed it, so technically I never changed anything, Dumbledore did and he's dead.'

'Was dead,' Albus stepped into the room to shocked or surprised looks. 'Did you really think I wasn't going to take that information Harry and do nothing?'

'You brought Sev back to me,' Harry felt his eyes well up again.

'Hey, no more tears love, I'm alive.'

'But I saw it, saw you die, I felt my heart breaking into pieces. I knew if this didn't work I would join you, I had one of your knives sharpened ready to use.'

'No more talk of killing yourself. You've finally got a life worth living, no more Voldemort, no more abusive muggle relatives, no more danger,' Severus caressed Harry's face but could still see the tears in Harry's eyes and knew it would take a long time before this pain he was feeling finally left enough for him to heal.


	18. Chapter 18

Chapter eighteen

'What do you mean abused?' Kingsley asked.

Harry lowered his head and closed his eyes, Severus could tell Harry was not going to talk so he knew he had to.

'His muggle relatives, they beat him, starved him, locked him in a cupboard and,' Severus saw Harry's head shake, but it wasn't to stop him talking, he knew Harry hated thinking about that time, 'They sexually abused him, raped him, as a child. Harry told me when I stopped him killing himself after Black died. I knew there was more to his pain, it took me a long time to get him to tell me everything.'

'So you suffered through that as a child then everything Voldemort put you through,' Kingsley moved away with Gawain and spoke quietly to Albus.

'Sev,' Harry choked.

'I'm here Harry, but they needed to know, they needed to realise why you were pushed too far this time, why you went to the extreme.'

'You were Harry, so you won't be charged. But I would like your word that you will never do anything against the law again, I won't be able to help next time.'

'I promise Kingsley, I needed Sev.'

'Yes, I can see that. Would you have killed yourself when you came back?'

'Yes, I can't live without Sev, he's my life, my everything, I knew I couldn't go on without him. Sev gave me a reason to live. But since I'm not in trouble anymore, Dumbledore isn't, is he?'

'Technically Albus did nothing wrong, he was dead. All he did was use what you told him and somehow got it to his future self which he worked into some plans, but he refuses to divulge what he did or how he did it.'

'Everyone needs their secrets Kingsley. Now I might go down and enjoy some of Molly's wonderful cooking. Harry, Severus, I will see you both at Hogwarts later today.'

'We got everything Harry, it's all good, now get better.'

'Now I have Sev I can, thanks Kingsley and sorry Mr. Robards, I didn't mean to offend you.'

'You didn't, the minister has filled me in on you, so it's perfectly understandable and smart actually. As Mad-eye used to say, "constant vigilance", Gawain, Kingsley, Albus, Severus and Harry said together before the other men left Harry and Severus alone.

'It's over love, no more danger, no more Voldemort, now we just have to get you well.'

'Um, my legs are tingling, so I think I am. Care to use your mouth now?'

Severus chuckled, 'No, because I'm sure Molly will be bringing breakfast up very soon.'

'Why did I know you were going to say that Sev. But think about it Sev, getting sick, it was worth it, I have you back, Fred's alive, Dumbledore's alive. I think now I can put everything behind me, finally.'

'Yes, you can and I can see it, your eyes have more life in them now than ever before,' Severus kissed Harry then put his arm around him and the two men fell silent, but their love spoke for them.

'Why didn't you tell him Albus?' Kingsley asked as he saw everyone crowded around the expanded kitchen table.

'Let him have a few minutes with Severus now he knows he won't be arrested. He's waited eighteen years, I'm sure he can wait a few more minutes.'

'Harry won't like you keeping this information from him professor, he used to tell us how angry you made him when you did that,' Ron shrugged.

'This time he might actually thank professor Dumbledore,' Hermione smiled, 'after he finishes yelling.'

Everyone chuckled, 'I think I could put up with Harry yelling at me, again. But Ron, Hermione, I believe we can skip the formalities, you can now call me Albus since you are no longer students.'

'So we won't get to do our N.E.W.T.s?' Hermione asked sounding disappointed.

'You can, but not at Hogwarts. It's going to take at least a year before the castle can take students again,' Kingsley said, 'So we've organised for you to take just the classes you wish, but at the ministry. We've set up a few rooms for everyone your age that couldn't return to Hogwarts to do their last year and we've organised for some to act as your teachers. Hestia jones is going to take you in defence against the dark arts, along with some others that you probably wouldn't know.'

'I'll take those two up their breakfast, all of you eat,' Molly floated all the food to the table before floating two trays in front of her.

'So after breakfast are you going to shock Harry?' Charlie asked.

'Definitely, will the room hold all of us? As I believe everyone will want to see his reaction.'

'It's not Harry's reaction I'm looking forward to, it's Snape's,' Charlie smirked then started eating as everyone else did, but they knew Charlie was right. When they all went upstairs they knew something was going to happen, they just weren't sure what.

Everyone that was at the Burrow walked up the stairs, Arthur knocked, 'Wait a minute,' Harry's voice yelled.

'They're not, are they?' Ron asked grimacing again.

'I don't think we'll know for sure Ron, but if I were to make a guess, I'd say Snape was making Harry…feel better,' Charlie smirked.

'Okay, you can come in,' Harry shouted again.

One by one everyone filed into the room, 'What is going on?' Severus looked at every member of the Weasley family, Hermione, Albus, Kingsley, the Grangers and the head auror.

'We have a surprise for Harry.' Albus said.

'But I'm not being arrested, so what else is there?'

'This,' Albus opened the door to allow five people to walk in.

'Oh fuck,' Harry went to move, 'I…I, Sev, help me sit up.'

Severus stared at the visitors before he pulled Harry against him, 'Stay still.'

'Sirius, mum, dad, oh god,' Harry choked, 'Remus, Tonks.'

Sirius, Lily and James all sat on the edge of the bed, 'We're here Harry, you did it, saved us, all of us,' Lily said kindly, 'We remember everything, you visiting us, before you arrived, then we're here, waking up at Hogwarts,' Lily reached out and wiped a tear from Harry's cheek, 'Don't cry.'

'But…but, oh god, Sev.'

'I've got you love, it's okay.'

'Harry son, I know you're in shock right now, we were when we woke up, it'll take time.'

Harry grunted as he moved his hand inch by inch until he reached his mother's hand, 'You're here.'

'We're here, all of us.'

'Harry, mate, it's all good, Albus worked some miracle,' Sirius said kindly, 'Snape.'

'Black, Potter, Lily,' Severus gave Lily a small smile.

'Oh, I'm going to end up exhausted.'

'What are you on about Harry?' Ron asked, 'Do you think he's snapped?' Ron asked quietly.

'Ron, think about it, my father and godfather with Sev, they hated each other, all I'll be doing is stopping them hexing each other.'

'Sirius and I spoke about this Harry, it's good, we're willing to put all that to rest if…Severus is.'

'You forgot that Lily threatened us, you no sex, me I'd get hexed so I couldn't shag.'

Harry chuckled, 'Mum has some spirit in her, good to know so I won't get on her bad side.'

'You already are sweetheart, you swore again, my son will not swear, I do not care if you're an adult.'

'You have to watch her Harry, Lily has a temper,' Severus whispered before looking at Harry's father and godfather, 'We put the past behind us, for Harry's sake.'

'Fair enough.'

'Damn,' Charlie scowled.

'What's up with you Charlie?' Harry asked.

'I thought it was going to be explosive in here. Sirius used to tell us about him, your dad and Snape, we thought hexes were going to fly.'

'You're out of luck Charlie,' Harry said then looked back at his parents, 'You're really here?'

'We are and we're not leaving you again.'

'Well, you have to give Sev and me some privacy, I do want to shag him very soon, until his stuck to the mattress. But look Sev, I have everything, I have you, I have my family, I have the best friends around, we're alive, we're healthy, now we can work on having a baby, that will make everything perfect.'

'So I get to have James Potter's grandchild, I don't think anyone saw that coming,' Severus saw James Potter splutter and choke exactly as Sirius Black did while everyone else laughed. But they realised that Harry was right, for the first time in his life, he had everything he ever wanted. The love of a man that loved him, he had his parents, his godfather and everyone else that was standing around his bed. Harry Potter was surrounded in love, the love of his family.

The end:


End file.
